Long Nights
by Hella-venger
Summary: Bakugo appearing at Kirishima's door for help was not something he was used to. Kiribaku. Trans!Bakugou.
1. Talks

Notes: Hey, just recently gotten through My Hero Acedamia and absolutely loved it! One thing in particular I kinda related to was Bakugo's anger issues. Before I realized I was a Trans Girl, I was a pretty angry person a lot, at least on the inside. So, that got me thinking about a possible Bakugou!Trans-Girl Headcanon! And this fanfic is what resulted.

Warnings: Dysphoria, internalized transphobia, slurs and Bakugo being Bakugo. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first before reading.

Also, Bakugo will be referred to He/Him pronouns for most of the fic, as she isn't sure of her identity yet.

Also, this story can be found under the same name on my AO3 account, Hailing Torrent.

* * *

 _*Knock! Knock! Knock!*_

"I'd like more pizza!" These words from a leftover dream came out of Kirashima's mouth as he catapulted his body forward. Quickly glancing around the room and out his window, he quickly summed up it was still night-time. His phone's glow displaying 3:00 AM confirmed his suspicion. Rubbing sleep out of his eyes, he began to wonder why he woke up. A repeated knocking on the door reminded him as it caught him off guard, making him nearly fall out of his bed.

Which brought forward the question of who could be knocking on his door at this time of the night? It could be Kaminari, looking to show off some new trick with his costume. This brought a bit of a smile to Kirashima's face. He was happy that his friend was succeeding so much with his progress. This wouldn't be the first time his friend made a point of coming to his room at an ungodly hour. Kaminari was a bit of a night owl, something to do with his quirk he said. The constant electricity going through his body gave him more energy than the average person, letting him stay up for nights on end before getting tired. You would think he would use that time for something productive. The mass amounts of that Kirashima receives from him in the morning says otherwise.

"I'll be there in a sec, Kami." A yawn came out of Kirashima's mouth as he said this, quickly standing up onto his feet. In his Crimson Riot pajamas, the Red-Haired member of Class-1A quickly shuffled over to the door, unlocking it before opening. With the mass amounts of villain attacks lately, you could never be too careful.

And while it wasn't a villain at the door, it was certainly a surprise.

Wide-open eyes. Shaking body. A bloody hand with a large white paper bag being held by it. This was where the initial surprise came from. The second surprise originated from the fact that it was Bakugo standing before Kirashima.

"Bakugo….?" Rubbing his eyes, Kirashima wasn't sure if it was his friend in front of him, or if he was just imagining things.

"Lemme the fuck in!" While it wasn't out of character for Bakugo to say something like this, the emotion in his voice was different. Where it was usually tired disdain for the person he was talking to mixed with a constant sense of anger, now it had panic tinging off the sides of it. Something had spooked Bakugo, and that was no easy task.

Kirishima picked up on the difference in Bakugo's manner, and it momentarily caused him to freeze up.

"Well?!" Bakugo continued, eyes clearly being erratic and frenzied. "You gonna keep standing there like a fucking idiot or what?"

The second time around knock Kirishima out of his shock, making him quickly stand to the side and let his friend in.

Before he entered Kirishima's room, Bakugo quickly looked up each end of the hall. It didn't take a genius to know he was making sure no-one saw him. Seemingly satisfied with was he scouted, Bakugo kept his head down and ran into the room.

Before he could offer his friend a seat, Kirishima found that Bakugo had made his home at the seat next to Kirishima's desk, under his post of Best Jeanist. Hugging the mysterious package he had with him to his chest, this reminded Kirishima of Bakugo's bleeding hand, which was beginning to stain the bag.

"Oh, man, you're hurt." For some reason, this caused Bakugo to wince slightly, like he had been slapped. Kirishima cursed to himself inwardly. Bakugo had a bad tendency to think of any concern as pity. "Here, I got some bandages" Kirishima kneeled down in front of his bed and pulled out a first aid kit he kept there for emergencies.

"Guess this is one." Muttering lowly to himself, Kirishima pulled out a set of All-Might themed bandages. He had different styled ones after the favourite heroes of everyone in the dorm. Seeing Crimson Riot stuff always cheered him up when he was down, so Kirishima hoped the same applied to his friends. Kirishima decided to leave the bandages on the desk near Bakugo. He knew that he would never in a million years let someone try to put on one him.

Bakugo didn't even move as the first aid contents were placed next to him. He just sat there, with his same panicked eyes as he had entered, breathing quickly and worryingly.

It was now starting to freak Kirishima out. Bakguo didn't get scared. Or at least, he never showed it. Kirishima suspected that he was hiding some stuff after what happened with the Villain's League. Some pain or stress over what might have happened. He tried to get his friend to talk about it, but would always end up getting the usual Bakugo shouts and cursing for his trouble.

For a few minutes, they sat in silence. Neither of them seemed to be enjoying it. Kirishima was scared that something was really bothering his friend. While Bakugo….It seemed to be hard pressed for Bakugo to enjoy anything right now.

However, soon his quick breathing began to slow down. It began to calm and relax. Bakugo started to release his iron grip on the paper bag he was so intent on protecting. After a few more minutes, he placed it next to him, but in a way that his foot was firmly clamped down upon it so no-one could take it. Bakugo grabbed the bandages, and wrapped one of them tightly around his wounded hand.

And with that, he got up, taking his bag with him, and made his way to the door.

"Tell anyone about this, and you're fucking dead." A usual Bakugo threat, but like earlier there was something different about it. It lacked the raw fire of his anger. Instead, it just sounded tired. Like the energy was just drained out of him. As he went to open the door, another hand quickly pushed it shut.

"No way. You're not leaving until you tell me what the hell's going on with you?" Rage wasn't something Kirishima was accustomed to. Sure, getting fired up and passionate, that he did. But actual anger? Not him. Except for when something was wrong with his friends. He especially hated it when people acted like they were OK when their whole world was going to hell.

"It's none of your damn business." This came out as a deep growl from the Blonde teenager, firmly stepping up to Kirishima to get him to back off.

"Really? Cos when you come into my room at three in the freaking morning, it becomes my problem." Kirishima returned the aggressive stance from Bakugo with his own.

"What?" A slight return of Bakugo's usual mocking tone crept into his voice once more. "Are we gonna sit around and have a tea party, talking about our feelings and cure everything wit love and teddy bears." A taunting grin came upon Bakugo's face, insulting Kirishima's emotional personality.

Letting out a quiet noise of exhaustion, Kirishima took his hand off the door.

"I don't get you! Obviously, something's wrong, but you're just too pig-headed to say anything. Is it about what happened before at the camp? With the villains? It's OK to talk about that stuff. Just level with me for once, man-to-man."

"STOP FUCKING CALLING ME THAT." In contrast to the quiet tone of before, Bakugo's voice was raised to a high point with this demand. As soon as he said it, he instantly began worrying he woke up the rest of the dorm and everyone would find out.

"Stop calling you what?" The confusion of Kirishima's voice was obvious. He knew that Bakugo had a short fuse, and what he said would've probably set him off. But Kirishima was honesty wondering what he called Bakguo to make him so angry. He hadn't called him anything. Except for…..

"A man." The whimper from this quiet whisper of Bakugo's spoke volumes about how he felt. Tears began to appear at the edge of his face as he let go of the door and walked over to Kirishima's bed, falling across it with his back. The bag he had been so intent on keeping a secret was now laid across Kirishima's feet.

A string of whispered curses could be heard from Bakugo, as he kept thudding his head on the soft surface of the bed.

Still in a dazed state, Kirishima began to go over everything he just heard. Realizing that talking to Bakugo would be better than just pondering over this, he grabbed the bag (Making sure not to look into it) and made his way over to his friend.

The cursing had now devolved into quite sobs, Bakugo's hands covering his face in shame.

"Why don't you want me to call you a man?" Kirishima mustered this as gently as he could, not wanting to aggravate Bakugo any further in his vulnerable state. He just wanted to make his crus-friend stop hurting.

The sobs continued, now punctuated with F-words and other assorted cursing as Bakugo tried to make himself stop. Eventually, he managed to sombre himself to the point of being able to talk again, sitting up as he got ready to do so.

"Look in the bag." A simple statement from Bakugo to probably the person he was closest to in the entire school.

"Why?" Kirishima had damn near forgotten about the bag at this point, only being concerned about his friend wellbeing.

"Jesus, are you always this stupid or are you taking fucking classes? Just look in the bag!" With a quick hand to the ground, Bakugo pulled up the paper container and pushed it into his companion.

Slightly worried and slightly curious, Kirishima slowly grabbed both ends of the bag and pulled it open. He made sure to keep one eye on Bakugo as he did so for any changes in him. All he noticeD was the occasional cursed whisper to himself as Bakugo balled his hands into fists.

Finally opening the bag, Kirishima's mouth fell slightly agape as he gazed at its contents. Coinciding with this surprise was quick groan from Bakugo. Needing a better look, Kirishima pulled out the item inside and let it out in front of him.

A dress. A black dress with ruffles on the end. This was what Bakugo was trying to hide with his life from anyone seeing.

"Is this for your Mom? It looks nic-" This was genuinely the first thought through Kirishima's head as he saw this.

"It's for me, dumbass." His head bowed, staring intently at his feet, Bakugo seemed to be brutally resigned to whatever happened to him.

"Oh." Kirishima couldn't think of anything else to say, honestly at a loss for words at the situation. Looking at the dress and back to Bakugo, the dots in Kirishima's mind began to line up, letting him ultimately realize what was happening and what was going on with Bakugo.

"Oh."

Another pained sob escaped from Bakugo's mouth as tears began to drop from his face.

"Go on, have a good fucking laugh. I know everyone else will when they find out. _Bakugo's a tranny!"_ This self-hateful taunt soon turned into full crying as her head fell down further.

Never having dealt with Bakugo like this, Kirishima's heart rate increased, trying to find some way to cheer up his friend.

"Hey, ma- Bakugo. None of us would ever laugh at you." Deciding to try something different, Kirishima brought an arm around Bakugo's shoulders, pulling him in close for comfort. To his surprise, Bakugo didn't resist one bit, simply continuing her breakdown.

"Don't fucking bullshit me. I know I'm just some mismatched freak." Bakugo looked up at Kirishima with tear stained eyes, bloodshot and despairing. Eyes challenging Kirishima to prove her wrong.

Shook having seen such self-loathing from the normally prideful Bakugo, Kirishima pulled him closer into a hug, trying to ease his friend's pain.

"Bakugo, you're our friend. No matter what, we'll be there for you." Hearing more crying from Bakugo, Kirishima decided to go for broke with her crush. "Besides, you'd make an amazing girl."

This caused a momentary stop to Bakugo's tears. Pushing away, Bakugo back herself up to the board of Kirishima's bed, her breathing and tear having momentarily relaxed for the moment.

They sat their together for a while. Kirishima checked his phone and realized it was now 5:30. He usually got up around 7. Today's class was not going to be fun. But that was the least of his worries.

"I saw it. Last time I was in that stupid shopping centre." Bakugo began, almost talking as much to herself as anyone. "It was sitting there, all pretty and shit. I saw some girls buying ones like it. And it just fucking hurt. Why couldn't I buy one? Why wasn't I allowed? Why did I have to be a fucking boy and they got to be girls?" Bringing a fist up to smash against the board, she instead softly let it land on the bed.

"So, I bought it. Dumbass running the counter thought it was for my Mom, just like you did. I thought if I bought it and tried it on, I'd realized that all these feelings were just fucking bullshit. That I was normal, like anyone else."

"Instead, it felt so right. More right than anything ever has. I felt everything finally made some fucking sense. And it was fuckin' terrifying. I didn't….deal with it well." Bakugo held up his bandaged hand as an indicator of this.

They sat in silence once again, Kirishima knowing how Bakugo felt now. What was going on in her world.

"Shit, this is fucked. Deku's going to get a great fucking kick out of this. The person who's been making his live miserable wants to be a girl. Like they'll let me become a hero after this." No tears came this time. Just a broken statement.

"Bakugo, listen to me." Kirishima decided to speak up, feeling it was his time.

"If you're a girl, than that's cool. Heck, it's more than cool, it's amazing. It just shows how strong you are to come out with it." Bakugo gave a glare towards Kirishima for his accidental pun, but the Red-Haired student continued. "And Midoria wants to be your friend. He won't give you crap over this." Looking towards Bakugo, Kirishima gave a comforting smile. "And if they won't let become a hero over this, then we'll do it anyway. Screw what they think. If they have a problem, they ain't heroes." Kirishima turned his hand to its rock form to symbolize the statement, holding it out for a fistbump.

Looking at the fist and back to Kirishima, Bakugo gave a little laugh before returning the gesture. Sighing, Bakugo got up to his feet, grabbing the bag with his hand and once again made her way to the door. This time, Kirishima had no intention of stopping her.

"Yo, Kirishima. Tell anyone about this and they'll find your fucking body in pieces." With her back turned to Kirishima, Bakugo held out one of her hands and a small explosion erupted from it.

"My lips are sealed." In some weird way, Kirishima was glad that Bakugo was back to her usual bad mood way. It showed she was feeling better.

Opening the door, Bakugo once again made sure to check if the coast was clear. Happy with what she saw, she turned back to her friend.

"And Kirishima? Thank you." With that, she closed the door and left.

Again looking at his clock, Kirishima pretty much decided he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight. It didn't matter. He was there for the girl he loved when she needed it. That's all that was important to him.

* * *

So, what did you think?

Thanks for reading :)


	2. Gifts

Notes: Hey, just had this chapter on my AO3 account, and decided to post it on here :)

Thanks to everyone for the positive feedback :) I really appreciated it :).

Enjoy!

* * *

Present Mic's English Class wasn't boring by any reach of imagination. To the veteran hero's credit, he did all he could to make it as interesting as possible. Through connecting relevant pop culture references to points of learning. Using his sound abilities make his voice more noticeable for parts worth remembering on tests. Hell, he even once sung _Major General's Song_ by Gilbert in Sullivan to its fullest in a high pitched voice. That got quite the laugh out of some of the students.

But right now, to Bakugou, it was like dragging nails on a chalkboard. But as if the scratching noise was being amplified on a megaphone. And there was screaming coinciding with it. And she was on fire.

Suffice to say, she wasn't enjoying himself. She found that even in her normal mood of the class for it to be tedious. What was the point of learning English? They're here to be heroes, not freakin' college professors. This just took up time when they could be learning something valuable.

"Kacchan, you're muttering under your breath." To only aggravate this time further for Bakugou, this little update came from Deku of all people. They've been going to school together for nearly ten months now, and their relationship has marginally improved if anything. Sure, she didn't make a point to create a living hell for Deku, but they still weren't friends. At least, Bakugou thought they weren't and wished Deku would think the same.

"Wow, thank you, Sherlock-Fucking-Holmes. Where would I be without your annoying-ass voice." This came out as a low mutter, ironically enough, but just loud enough for Midoriya to hear and register. As if to show that the comment landed, Midoriya flinched backwards and sat back into his seat, not wishing to talk anymore.

The layout of the class was normal enough by their standards. Midoriya sat with Uraracka and Iida, the two of them now staring at the back of Bakugou with frustration. Bakugou merely replied with a lazy glare at them in return.

Seto and Kaminari were in the back, seemingly talking about something and hoping Present Mic didn't hear. If Bakugou knew anything, it was probably about memes or some shit.

Todoroki sat in the front, intently listening to everything said as if each word was a blessing of wisdom. Ojiro, Tokoyami and Shouji were to the side by the windows passing notes with each other. They had been put together on a group project for Economics class and talked Present Mic into allowing them to work on it in this class.

Speaking of projects, Mineata and Hagakure were working on a nature, or land project or something like that. Bakugou couldn't remember. What she did remember was that it got them out of this class, which scored some envy points from the No.1 student in the class, who'd rather be doing anything than grammar work.

In the similar vein of absentees, Aoyama, Saitou and Kouda all came down with some sort of flu. Through intense investigation (By which they mean, Deku muttered and wrote in his journal for about ten minutes straight to figure it out.) They realized it came from their recent hike through the mountains, but God knows what it was.

Yayourzo was scribbling down everything she heard, pretty similar to how Todoroki was acting, taking it seriously and all. What really caught Bakugou's attention was the Jirou seemed to be abandoning even trying to look like she was listening, instead just staring intently at the back of Yayourzo's head. Amazing how everyone in this class but those two could see the feelings Jirou had for Momo from a mile away. Bakugou would make a snide comment, but she found that her recent circumstances made it harder for to poke fun at other vulnerabilities, mainly out of fear they might discover Bakugou's own.

Thinking about that caused her to grip her pencil slightly harder. It had been a week since she finally realized that she….well, was a she. Coming to terms with wasn't easy, and Bakugou was a long ways from fully accepting it. Even just talking in chat rooms about it made her feel nervous and like she was about to fall apart. There was also her unfortunate habit of getting kicked out of said chat-rooms due to violent outbursts and excessive cursing. There were a lot of mixed emotions coming forward with the realisation. Hell, she used to bully kids in Middle-school for going through the same thing. Bakugou was bitterly aware of the irony of the whole situation. A tinge of guilt also came back when she thought of those times, but it was generally outweighed by the intense dysphoria and frustration of the whole thing.

Keeping it a secret was her top priority. She felt as if any of the others found out, they would never let her hear the end of it. She had given everyone in this class a lot of trouble, and she was sure they would be looking for some payback. There was also another fear. Pity. They would feel bad for her and want to help get through it. She didn't need these idiots help, she'd be fine on her own. But thanks to Kirishima, she wasn't quite on her own.

And there was the sole person who knew. And he happened to be sitting right next to her, a big grin on his face as he laughed at Present Mic's puns and quips. Bakugou still regrets going into his room that night, but also felt oddly comforted to know there was someone who knew and wasn't treating her any differently. They had the same old relationship. Kirishima would be friendly and energetic and Bakugou would tell him to go fuck himself, but not actually refusing to hang out with him.

While Kirishima was on her right at the wall, the remaining two of the class, Tsyuu and Ashido were both laxed on the chairs to the left of her, listening to Present Mic but at the same time trying to have a conversation with one another about plans for the Summer. Something about a trip to the beach or some shit like that. Bakugou resisted the urge to roll her eyes at them.

"AND THAT, MY DEAR CLASS, IS WHAT A _GERUND_ IS DEFINED AS! NOW, ONTO _PARTICEPLES,_ OH YEAH!" With a quick spin, Present Mic erased the previous lesson across the board and replaced it with the current one.

Letting out a groan nearly as loud as Mic's voice, Bakugou let her head fall to the table, a sharp thud sound going from it.

" _Just ten more minutes. Just ten more fucking minutes and I'm out of here."_ This calming mantra was repeated through Bakugou's mind as she continued to lay her head on her desk.

"Psst!"

Bakugou ignored whatever that sound was, continuing to internally repeat the thought.

"Psst! Bakugou!" She could now tell two things.

1: This person was talking to her.

And 2: It was Kirashima.

Letting out a trademark growl, Bakugou picked up her head to face her best friend. ( _"Did I just fucking call the Red Riot fanboy my best friend? Shit, I must be going crazy.")_

"What do you want, Spikes?" Bakugou was unaware of the hypocrisy of calling someone else that. Or she just didn't care. Most likely the second one.

To her surprise, Kirishima was not facing her. In fact, he seemed to be doing everything besides looking at her. To listening forward to the teacher, or waving cheerfully at the others in the class.

What did catch Bakugou's attention was a crumbled ball of paper on her desk which she for damn sure knew wasn't there before. Throwing another grumpy look towards her best friend ( _"Goddammit, did it again.")_ , which once more got no reaction from Kirishima, she let out a huff and uncrumbled the piece of paper.

" _Meet me in my room after class. I got a surprise for you, girlie_ _."_

The blush that appeared on Bakugou's face was a new feeling she wasn't used to. A lot of new things she was dealing with lately. While Kirishima hadn't changed how he treated Bakugou after finding out, there were slight differences to his behaviour. While he usually ranted and raved about manliness towards everyone, including the girls, she got kind of quiet about that sort of thing whenever Bakugou was in the room. Gone were the greetings of "Bakugou, my man!" Now replaced with "Bakugou, my friend!" Bakugou wasn't sure if she was grateful or annoyed by Kirishima's support. Probably a mix of the two.

But calling Bakugou a girl was definitely something that Kirishima hadn't done yet. Bakugou was still not used to the concept of it all. Sure, she pictured it, imagined when she was awake in her bed of a world where everyone would see her as the girl she was without batting an eye. In her dreams, it was all she wanted. But in real life, it did feel damn good and damn right, but also terrifying. Fear that someone would find out and make fun of her.

Looking at Urakraka, the reasons for her fear was brought to the surface. Girly-Girl over there never had these worries. Never had this fear that if she told the world that she was a girl, that it wouldn't just laugh and mock her. She could go through her whole life, being known and seen as a girl without ever having a bad thought in her head. To Bakugou, she didn't have that luxury. Everything about her. Her body. Her personality. Her history. It would all be used against her to prove that she could never be a girl. And that ate Bakugou up inside.

Before she could continue dwelling on this, the sudden sound of the bell ringing knocked her out of her thoughts. Looking forward, she could see Mic putting his books away and saying something about homework. Still a bit zoned out, Bakugou didn't get any of it. Didn't really matter, she'd get it off Kirashima later.

Shit, Kirishima.

Darting her eyes across the room for sign of her best friend ( _"MOTHERFUCKER, WHY DO I KEEP DOING THAT?!")_ she caught sight of his signature red hair at the end of the room, smiling and chatting to Kaminari. Almost jumping to her feet with a spring, she quickly makes her way over to the duo. With a swift hand, she grabs the back of Kirishima's collar, ignoring the yell from him as she does so.

"Numnuts is comin' with me." This is said as almost an afterthought to Kaminari as she practically drags Kirishima out of the room.

Once they reach the hall, which Bakugou is thankful for being empty around this time of day (The first years finish at a different time than the other years and courses, pretty much ensuring empty hallways a lot of the time.) she pulls out the crumbled piece of paper and shoves it into Kirishima's chest.

"Care to explain this, you fucking rooster?" Kirishima had been attempting to keep her voice neutral at this time. She was rather failing at it as the rage began to seep in.

Blinking a few times in confusion, Kirishima looked down at the piece of paper and back to Bakugou. At that moment, a friendly smile appeared on his face.

"Oh, I got something you might really like. Can't wait to show you it." The toothy grin only got larger after this.

"That's not what I meant." Bakugou forcefully took the piece of paper back and pointed to the part where it referred to her as a girl. "What in the hell were you thinking of doing?! What if one of those fuckers saw this, huh?! Thought you were gonna actually try and keep this a secret, instead of just fucking half-assing it like you do everything else." While the temper of Bakugou was seeping through, she kept her voice to a low whisper. She definitely didn't want anyone else hearing about this.

While an expression of guilt appeared on Kirishima's face at the realisation of what she did, it turned to hurt, puppy-dog like look after Bakugou's insult. Bakugou cursed as she saw this. When Kirishima made that face, it made her feel…..not good. The same feeling she gets when she messes up in training or doesn't do well on a test. Like she did something wrong.

"I'm sorry, I- I didn't think it through. I just thought you might like it." Turning his to the side, Kirishima looked both pained and ashamed.

That "not-good" feeling Bakugou had only got worse as she saw the emotion on Kirishima's face. She came out ready to tear Kirishima apart over this, and now she just wished she could take it back.

"What I like doesn't fucking matter. You Just have to be smart about this. Both of us do." On the last word of that sentence, Bakugou put a particular emphasize on. It may not have been her first choice to tell anyone, but she'd admit she wouldn't want anyone besides Kirishima with her going through this.

The calming of Bakugou also caused a similar relaxing of Kirishima's worried expression. Coughing to the side to try and forget the awkwardness of what just happened, he looked up towards Bakugou.

"S-so. Do you still wanna see what got for you?"

"May as well. Ain't got jack-shit else to do." A small shrug of the shoulders accompanied Bakugou's agreement. What he didn't say was that he was also kind of curious about what Kirishima had in store. The reference to her as a girl in the message most likely meant it had something to do with her being trans, which only strengthened Bakugou's interest in it. She never had any opportunity to explore her identity outside of chatrooms and late night dysphoria-ridden talks.

The smile beginning to return to Kirishima's face, he quickly slapped an arm around Bakugou's shoulders, letting out a small laugh as he did so. While she grumbled in return, she didn't draw away from the arm. Didn't stop her from continuing to grumble though.

As the duo made their way towards the door, Kirishima looked towards the ground with a similar nervous expression as before.

"Did-did you like it?" Bakugou didn't need clarification to know he was talking about the last word in the letter.

"Coulda used something a bit more fuckin' creative than 'girlie'." Kirishima didn't need clarification to know that this meant she did appreciate it, in her own Bakugou way.

* * *

The dorms weren't in a particularly different manner than it was most days. The rec room was the same, a few text books from yesterday's homework still spread on the table from last night's study session. Not that Bakugou joined them. She did perfectly fine by herself, thank you very fucking much. Although, her grades had been slipping ever so slightly over the last few weeks. Barely anything more than a few percent off on tests, but damned if it didn't seem like a mile of difference to Bakugou. Apparently, crippling with gender identity issues has a bad effect on your grades. Who would've fuckin' knew.

The duo walked up towards the hallway, heading through the boys row.

 _Boys row._ Just the words of it made Bakugou uncomfortable. It wasn't a fucking Boy's row if she was in it.

The two stopped right in front of Kirishima's door, the Red Riot door sign on it signalizing the ownership for all to see.

" _Jesus, could he be more of a fucking nerd for the guy?"_ Hands tucked in pockets, Bakugou kicked the carpet absentmindedly as she waited for Kirishima to open the door. After a few seconds of waiting for the sound of the knob turning, she realized this was taking a lot longer than it should.

 _*Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap! Tap!*_

Bakugou had seen many strange things in her life. Quirks that were nearly eldritch and weird as fuck. A former Bully-victim of hers who somehow inherited the abilities of her idol. Failing the Provisional Hero Exam. (To Bakugou, she could never wrap her head around how others passed and she didn't.)

But Kirishima, right now in front of her, tapping with both his balled up fists on the surface of the door ranked up with the weirdest.

"What in the jack-jumping fuck are you doing?"

"Drum-roll. Building up the excitement." A goofy grin was stretched on Kirishima's face as he said this.

"You're going to be building up a few broken bones if you don't open the goddam door." A part of Bakugou would never admit that she kind of admired this goofy side of Kirishima. How much bravery it took to act this way without fearing how others thought of him.

The grin lessening, but not disappearing, Kirishima rooted in his pocket for his key. Quickly finding it, he unlocked the door and stood to the side, sweeping his arms outward for Bakugou to come in.

Bakugou mumbled something and made his way past Kirishima into the room. She almost needed to cover her eyes when she came in. The bright redness of it all nearly made it hard for her to look at it. How Kirishima dealt with it, she'd never know.

Speaking of Kirishima, as soon as Bakugou entered, he had speedily made her way past her and made a beeline for the space under her bed. As he began rummaging through the contents under it, she started to reveal the mysterious surprise.

"So, you remember that dress you showed me?"

Eyes wide. Bleeding hand. Quick breathing. The night started to come back to Bakugou. Kirishima seeing her like that. Fragile. Weak. It made her feel like she couldn't do a damn thing but watch her world crumble. She didn't want to remember that night, even with the help it gave her.

"Yeah. Yeah I remember. What about it?"

Continuing to sort through the space between the ground and her bed, Kirishima stopped for a moment. Remembering how hard of a night that was for Bakugou only began to hit her just now. Bakugou could swear she heard him curse to himself before he started sorting again.

"W-well." Kirishima continued, slightly more nervous with the tone of his voice. "I couldn't get this thought outta my head that I saw it somewhere before. Like, felt really familiar, ya' get me. It was driving me insane." An 'Ah!' sound came next from Kirishima as he backed out of the space. Bakugou noticed that he now had a small box in his hands, about a metre long.

"And then it hit me! My sis, Ursa, remember from the Sport's Festival?" Kirishima looked up at Bakugou, awaiting an answer.

"Believe it or not, but your family life isn't a big deal to me." Folding her arms, Bakugou started to lean backwards off the wall, pivoting on the heels of her feet. It may have been rude, but Bakugou honestly couldn't remember Ursa. She probably remembered Bakugou though. The state she was in at the award ceremony, kinda hard to forget.

Wincing slightly at the words of Bakugou, his smile faltering a tad, he quickly brought it back, hoping Bakugou didn't notice.

But Bakugou did. And the "Not-Good" feeling came back.

"Well, I finally remembered where I saw it before. Ursa used to own the same dress. Some coincidence, am I right?" Kirishima gave Bakugou another eager look, apparently hoping that he would receive a better response this time.

A snarky comment came bubbling up, but quickly died down in Bakugou when she felt the "Not-Good" feeling again. Instead she just 'tch'd' and looked off to the side.

"I dunno."

"Anyway, I was talking to her about it." This earned Kirishima a sharp and worried glare from Bakugou, which quickly got a reassuring hand wave back. "Oh, don't worry, I just said that Uraraka was looking for a dress. Ursa's met her, so she believed me." Getting up to his feet, he strode over to Bakugou and held out the box in an excited form.

"Well, open it up. I think you're really gonna like it." Bakugou didn't need to hear this to know that. Kirishima's ear-to-ear grin told anyone who could see what he was thinking.

Looking from Kirishima and then back down the box, Bakugou hesitantly took it into her hands, slowly opening the lid.

Inside were a pair of black heels. The sole part of it was covered in a soft fabric, while the heel itself seemed to be made out of some high-pricey material. God be dammed if Bakugou knew what it was. Who the fuck is she, Yayorzu?

Didn't make them seem any less beautiful though.

"I remembered she was wearing these shoes with them, so I asked her where she got them. Made a trip down to Ol' _Jameson's Retailers_ on the weekend and picked up a pair. What do you think?The innocent and excited grin only seemed to become moreso, if that was possible.

A loss for words. Rarely was Bakugou that. The only feminine thing she owned was the dress, and that she bought for herself. These shoes. To have them come from a friend. It made her feel something. Like the opposite of the "Not-Good" feeling. Bakugou supposed that would be a good feeling. She seemed to have a lot of those with Kirishima.

"You….you paid for these?" Before Kirishima could answer, Bakugou had already placed them to the side and was fishing out her wallet. "How much?"

Holding up his hands in deference, Kirishima quickly shook his head side to side.

"Relax, Bakugou. It's a gift. Just remembered my sister had 'em and thought you might like 'em."

Once again, no words. Bakugou had only Come Out to Kirishima a week ago, and he was already getting her gifts. It wasn't as if Bakugou had never had positive reinforcement. She's had a lot of that. But the fear of being rejected , being outcast for telling anyone she was a girl was like a chokehold on her whenever she tried to say it. To have someone not just be OK with it, but to actively support her? She couldn't think of how to reply.

Reluctantly placing her wallet back, Bakugou placed the shoes back in the box and held the package under her arm.

"Well, thanks I guess." Bakugou wanted to do more than say that. She wanted to tell Kirishima how much she appreciated this, how much safer and braver it made her feel. But she was Bakugou. She didn't do all that emotional shit.

Leaning off the wall, she made her way to the door, waving a hand in farewell as she said goodbye. From Bakugou, this was practically a heartfelt farewell.

"Wait." Eyes wide. Bleeding hand. Quick breathing. It returns. Bakugou trying to leave the room, but Kirishima stopping her, driven to figure out what was wrong. Her fists nearly clenching on instinct, Bakugou turns back around to her best friend ( _"Huh, didn't bother me as much that time. Still feels fuckin' weird though.")_

"Yeah, what do you want?" Bakugou was hoping to God that she was keeping any nervousness from the memories out her voice. Like before, she doesn't do emotional shit.

Rubbing the back of his head nervously, Kirishima seems to be trying to gather the courage to say something.

"I was just kinda wondering if you wanted to hang out here for a bit? I got some new games if you wanna try."

"Sure, ain't got nothin' else to do." Bakugou was nearly surprised as anyone at how quickly that came out. She wasn't someone to be eager to hang out with others. But Kirishima wasn't 'others'. He was the one person in the school who she could talk to without feeling like she was being pitied or challenged against. There was a reason she choose Kirishima's room that night.

Blinking a moment in surprise, Kirishima's excited smile returned in full force as he ran to the to the TV, plugging in console and controllers while rambling about all the games they could play. _Halo. Gears of War. For Honor._ They all came out in a blur nearly.

Knowing that Kirishima wasn't looking, Bakugou let out a rare smile. One he reserved for her mother when she said "I love you." One she reserved for when she was celebrating a hard won victory. One she reserved for when she was happy.

And she was nothing if not happy when she's with Kirishima.

* * *

So, what did you think?

Please read and review

Thanks for reading!


	3. Shoes

Howdy everyone! Sorry for how sparsely I update this fic on the site. I mostly post it on AO3 as a collection of fics, but if people are interested, I could post what I have it more regularly here.

Thanks to everyone for the Reviews, Favorites and Follows! I very much appreciate it!

Also, this fic contains Internalized Transphobia, Self-Loathing, Dysphoria and Bakugou being Bakugou. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first before reading.

* * *

 _Thinking. Thinking. Thinking. Thinking. Thinking._ There was little else going on in this room besides that. Well, at least on Kirishima's side anyway.

Bakugou on the other hand seemed to be keeping on her usual "Resting Bitch Face" as she awaited Kirishima's answer. Apparently, the waiting was getting too long for her.

"Come on, you fuckin' Rooster. You know this. A fanboy like you has to." Spinning a small yellow pencil between her fingers, Bakugou took a second to regulate her breathing. _In for five seconds. Out for five seconds._ A little calming technique she had learned in one of her chatrooms.

With Kirishima's help, she had managed to get herself reaccepted into her previously-kicked out Trans Support Message Board ( _Transformers!_ A name Bakugou hated but Kirishima couldn't love more.) It helped that the admins had been used to angry people on it before. Transistioning could be a frustrating and arduous process, someone like Bakugou wasn't exactly new. Although, they only agreed to let her back in if she worked on being less…well, 'Bakugou' about everything. Which eventually led to her being recommended a few anger-management techniques by admins and other users on the site. While Bakugou deemed it "A load of horseshit" whenever Kirishima asked about it, she was beginning to notice that it had a positive effect on her.

Especially during moments like this.

Fuckin' Eraser had begun dolling out what he called "The Test Barrage." Which Bakugou was sure is code for "I'm a bored and sadistic old prick, so I'm gonna give you tests every fucking week and put you in detention if you don't get at least a 70% on 'em." Although, Aizawa claimed otherwise when Bakugou loudly brought it up.

It was all to prep for their Finals. Their academic finals, not physical. No, they wouldn't be sitting in Bakugou's room right now if it was for just smashing and breaking shit. Bakugou had no problem with any written stuff. The foggy haze that had been over her mind during the early weeks of the Transistion had begun to fade as of late. Not gone. D _efinitely_ not gone. But, she had gotten back on the horse when it came to her grades. Lucky she did too. Any longer and the faculty would begin asking questions about her recent drop in scores. She was still a looooooooooooooooonnnnng way from telling anyone about this.

Barring the person she was currently tutoring.

Unlike her, Kirisihma didn't have Bakugou's skill in academics. He wasn't stupid. Bakugou knew that, even if she never really told him. Kirishima just had a hard time applying himself to anything other than super-heroics. He had a passion, but needed practice at focusing that passion.

The tutoring between them wasn't anything new. Kirishima had been coming to Bakugou long before this. Long before he found out she was a girl. Long before he gave her the best gift she had ever gotten.

 _"Jesus Christ, that was a load of sappy shit."_ Bakugou wasn't quite in touch with showing her emotional side, even in her thoughts.

But, with theses weekly tests, Kirishima seemed to be dealing with the pressure a lot less well. He was jumpy. More quiet. Probably didn't help that during the first week, he was the only one to fail. Being kept in detention for an hour after everyone else had left must have been pretty embarrassing. Plus, Kirishima was a social butterfly, didn't like being separated from the group. Probably more than anyone in the class. VERY much more so than Bakugou, which only confused the Blonde haired teenager about why she hung out with him so much. Why he was one of the few people she didn't punch after talking to them for more than five minutes. Why she felt weirdly OK with him knowing about her, even if she didn't intend for it to happen.

Realizing she was getting caught in another one of her "Sappy Bullshit" thoughts, Bakugou gave a quick shake of her head and refocused her eyes on Kirishima.

"I'm gonna ask ya' again. If you get it wrong, I'm burning that fuckin' Red Riot poster above your bed." Bakugou and Kirishima both knew that she wasn't actually going to do this. With her anger beginning to become less so as she spent more time in the school (Which was to say still a great deal more than anyone in the entire campus), her threats had become more of a figure of speech rather than actual threats. Something she just used to pepper her language.

Holding up the textbook in her hands to her face, Bakugou found the question she had been asking.

"In the United Kingdom, who was the first Hero with a Quirk that allowed them to fly?" And now, she waited.

Sitting cross legged in front of her, a _Blue-Jeanist_ jacket resting across his shoulders, Kirishima still had the same thoughtful expression marked on his face. Tapping the side of his notebook, which was held lazily in his left hand, Kirishima started mumbling something under his breath. Bakugou could make out that he was trying to list every UK Hero he knew. A good technique, but wouldn't really be practical in a test.

"Do you always take this long to answer a simple freakin' question, Rooster? Or is it beca-"

"Flying Freedom!"

While this came out suddenly and pretty loud from Kirishima, Bakugou barely reacted beyond slightly raising her eyebrows.

Taking in the answer, Bakugou nodded and drew a 'tick' sign next to the question. The last one on today's list.

"25 out of 30. Maybe you actually have something in that fucking head besides useless Red Riot trivia and figuring out different ways to say 'MANLY!'" Standing up off her bed, Bakugou stretched out her back, having been sitting in that position for about an hour. Kirishima was similarly getting up, while also doing a fistbump to himself.

Bakugou shook her head good-naturedly at this display. She was finding the parts of Kirishima that used to annoy her to become more and more endearing. She wasn't planning on telling him about that anytime soon, however.

"Whelp, now comes the time I look forward to most at the end of these boring ass session." Bakugou made her way over to the door, throwing it open with one hand. "Get the fuck out of my room." Once again, there was less anger in Bakugou's voice as she said this than there would be if she was doing this a few months ago. A certain memory of when the entire "Bakusquad" as they called themselves (Much to Bakugou's Chagrin) had decided to prepare a surprise party for Bakugou's birthday.

It took a month to fix the explosion-caused damage to her room after that.

Standing by the door, Bakugou was soon aware of the fact that Kirisihima had yet to leave.

"Ya' waiting for something, Rooster?" An annoyed tone was beginning to slip into Bakugou's voice.

"Got time?"

Hearing this, Bakugou grumbled slightly under her breath and swiftly slammed the door shut. Making her way over to her bed, she returned to her spot.

"What now?"

It had been a few weeks since Kirishima had given Bakugou those shoes. After that, Kirishima had begun asking Bakugou more…..questions.

 _"How did you know you're a girl?"_

 _"What name do you want me to call you?"_

 _"Can I do anything to help?"_

And Bakugou reacted to these questions in her usual way.

"Shut the fuck up. It's none of your business."

But, Bakugou had begun to feel alone in it all. The chatrooms helped, but she hated just talking to a screen for all her problems. And there was no one in the group she'd exactly consider a friend.

Hell, in Yuu'ei, the only person she'd thought of as a friend would be Kirishima. And this led to her beginning to realize that icing him out might not be the best coping method.

So, one day, Bakugou took Kirishima aside and laid down some ground rules for questions:

1: Anything about medical stuff was off limits. Kirishima didn't question this for a second.

2: If Bakugou tells you to shut the fuck up about a question, you shut the fuck up. Once again, Kirishima didn't question this.

A third unofficial rule popped up after the first few times they did this.

3: If you ever want to ask a question, you gotta say "Got time?" The first few times Kirishima had tried to bring up any of his questions, it was about five minutes of him awkwardly trying to find the words to phrase it. They found they saved a lot of time by shortening it to a code.

Sitting down next to her, Kirishima locked his hands together and begun twiddling with his thumbs. A sign that he was nervous. Nervous about what he was going to ask. The fact that his hair wasn't gelled up like it usually was only amplified the fact that this wasn't the usual confident Kirishima.

And this bugged the hell out of Bakugou.

"Oh my Fucking God! If you wanna ask something, just fucking ask it! I've got things to do you know. Not just sitting around here for pansy shit." While Bakugou did consider Kirishima the only person in the school who's opinion she gave a damn about, it still didn't make her demeanour changed a lot at times.

Bakugou was rewarded with the rather rude statement by a low mutter from Kirishima. Too low for her to make out this time.

"I'm sorry, I don't speak dumbass! Speak up!"

"Can-I-see-you-try-on-the-shoes?" This came out faster than Gran Torino moving. Almost too fast for Bakugou to register. _Almost_ , being the key word.

"Why the fuck do you want to see that?" Bakugou wasn't sure if the blush on her face was caused by rage or embarrassment. Bakugou thought Kirishima was different. Thought that he was OK with this.

And while he was, Bakugou's mind tended to go into defensive mode when touchy subjects about her Transness came up.

And when the defensiveness rose, so did _that_ voice.

 _"He thinks you're a freak."_ This taunting voice that Bakugou heard inside her mind was one she had become acquainted with over the years. Ever since she first had a look at her Mom's lipstick and wondered if she could try it on. It always followed her, it's low and hushed tone creeping in her mind.

 _"What, you think he accepts you? You're a joke to him! He just wants to see the freak all dressed up. He's probably already told everyone behind your back. Face it. You're just a little messed up boy playing girl."_

The sounds outside barely made an impact on Bakugou. She was frozen, the voice constricting her movements. The impact of its words suffocating her, making it impossible for her to talk and react.

She began thinking of what would happen if everyone found out. Her Mom and Dad disowning her. The school kicking her out. Kirishima revealing that he never saw her as a girl, and just found it funny to mess with her. Bakugou couldn't take that. Not Kirishima. She may put on the tough, I-don't-care front on for everyone. But she was a house of cards. Had been for years. Terrified if one little thing went awry, be it not succeeding as a hero, losing a fight or this, it would all fall apart.

"Hey, Bakugou. You OK?" The words came through muffled, as if she had earmuffs on. Nothing mattered on the outside. Just these thoughts tearing her apart.

A soft hand founds itself on her shoulder. Not hers. Someone else.

Looking up, she saw Kirishima sitting right next to her, hand trying to calm her, a concerned expression painted on his face.

If this was anyone else, any other time, Bakugou would tear their fucking hand off. And probably most of their arm along with it.

But this wasn't any other time, or any other person. This was Kirishima, and during a bad dysphoria attack.

And she wasn't sure what the fuck to do in this situation.

They just sat there. The silence deafening. Neither one of them willing to speak. Bakugou out of fear. Kirishima because he understood. The lack of sound was too loud to ignore. The hand never left Bakugou's shoulder. Kirishima felt like Bakugou needed it.

Finally, Bakugou broke the silence.

"Are you gonna laugh at me?"

"W-what?"

Looking up, Bakugou's eyes were a million miles away. She was still in her thoughts, lost and trapped there. This was her sending a message to the outside. A call for help.

"Is that why you want to see me in them? Do you just want to fucking laugh and point. Is that it?" Without meaning to, Bakugou's hands began to form into fists. The rational part of Bakugou's mind knew this isn't what Kirishima wanted to do. His reason was probably something innocent and gentle. Something so very Kirishima-like.

But the rational part of her mind was taking a backseat right now.

The hand left her shoulder. Kirshima stood up, moving in front of Bakugou. Quietly, he kneeled down in front of his friend.

"Bakugou, I said it before and I'll say it now. I will never laugh at you. What you're going through, what you're doing. I can't imagine anything as brave. I don't think there's a girl cooler in this world than you. If you don't want to try on the shoes, that's fine. I won't ask again." Having said what he needed to say, Kirishima returned to his seat next to Bakugou, once again understanding it wasn't his place to talk right now.

The words managed to bring Bakugou out from inside her mind. Gave her the strength to silence the words that had been coming down on her mind. A weak, barking laugh came out of her.

"Christ, I'm turning into such a crybaby." Bakugou fell laying down on her bed, not quite like her old self, but getting there.

"Do you…..Do you wanna talk about it?" This came as gently as it could from Kirishima. Bakugou could tell from the "kicked puppy dog" look on his face that he was blaming himself for this.

"Nah, talking's for losers." Kicking back up onto her feet, Bakugou made her way over to the shelf that hung out of the back wall. "Maybe some other time." She said, looking back over her shoulder. After doing so, she began sifting through the assorted boxes and containers.

"Eh, Bakugou? What are you doing?" Kirishima was a bit nervous over what just happened. One second Bakugou seemed to be having a panic attack. Now, she was looking around her room without a care in the world.

"Getting the shoes. Jesus, you really are dumb as shit." Bakugou was beginner to return to form. Before she could continue talking, the hand reappeared on her shoulder. Only this time it spun her around.

"Bakugou." Kirishima began, the guilty expression still covering his face. "You don't have to do this. I was being an idiot asking."

"You're right." Bakugou replied. "You are a fucking idiot." Bakugou flicked Kirishima's head softly in admonishment. "I'm not doing this cos YOU want me to. I'm doing it cos I WANT to. You gave me these shoes about three weeks ago, and I still haven't tried them on. Better Woman up and do it sooner or later." Quickly turning around, Bakugou continued her search.

"Do you want to know why I asked?" Kirishima was a bit surprised by the sudden change in emotion from Bakugou. A bit of worry coming along with the surprise.

"Could not give less of a shit." Bakugou calmly and dryly responded with. After about another half a minute of searching, Bakugou found what she was looking for. Before taking the box, she looked over her shoulder at Kirishima "Like you said, you're not gonna laugh at me. So, why should I care."

The box had no dust gathering on it. While Bakugou hadn't tried them on, she had spent a lot of time looking at them. The fabric. The material the heel was made out of. The way they were made. Building up confidence for this moment.

Taking the box into her hands, Bakugou it on the ground and softly popped open the lid. (At least as softly as Bakugou could manage.) Bakugou pulled out the pair. They looked the same as last time. The amazing black fabric and solid build.

Still the most beautiful thing Bakugou had ever seen.

Quickly popping off her shoes, she adjusted the straps of the heels and awkwardly tried to stand.

The first thing that hit her was:

 _"Wow, I am really fuckin' tall in these."_

The second thing to hit her was:

 _"Oh shit, I'm falling!"_

The third thing to hit her was the ground.

"Bakugou! Are you OK?" Rushing over, Kirishima bent down over his fallen friend, trying to search for any injury.

"Kirishima, I've been in actual fucking fights with super-humans. Do you honestly fucking think that FALLING would hurt me?" In all honesty, Bakugou felt offended if anything.

Rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment, Kirishima let out an apologetic grunt. As he stood up, he held out a hand for Bakugou to take.

Bakugou didn't need to take it. But she did anyway. It'll make Kirishima feel good. That was her rational. And she wasn't about to let any other thoughts about why she did it enter her head.

"So?" Bakugou started ambiguously, giving Kirishima a quizzical head tilt.

At a lost at what he was supposed to say, Kirishima let out a long "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" sound.

Rolling her eyes, Bakugou lightly punched Kirishima's arm.

"How did I look? Fucking numbnuts."

"Before or after you fell?" A rare moment of snark from Kirishima.

"Before!" Bakugou barked out angrily. Many things about Kirishima she found endearing. His jokes were not one of those things.

While he still had his confused expression from before, Kirishima couldn't stop the smile from growing on his face.

"You looked amazing, Girl! Like one of those models in the magazines my sister has."

While she couldn't stop a similar smile from appearing on her face, Bakugou gave a "tch" to disguise the obvious happiness she felt from Kirishima's compliment.

"How did you feel?"

Now this caught Bakugou off guard. She had almost forgotten about that. Hell, she barely had time to register what she felt before she tripped on her own shoes. But she knew how she felt.

"I felt." Bakugou looked up softly at Kirishima. "Felt like me."

* * *

So, what did you think?


	4. Running

Hey everyone! Sorry for the late update. Just kept forgetting to get around to uploading.

Thank you so much for all the reviews, favorites and follows! They are much appreciated.

TWs for this chapter are referenced Transphobia, Gender Dysphoria and Panic Attacks. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first.

* * *

 _"OK, Ei! You can do this. Just focus. You can do that. Right? Yeah, totally. I can definitely do that. Wait, is it weird that I'm talking to myself. Or….'thinking to myself?' Ah, it's probably nothing."_

Shaking his head, Kirishima began attempting to once more attempt at reading through his studies. The tutoring with Bakugou had been helping a lot, got his grade up by about 20%. But Kirishima didn't like relying on Bakugou too much. Especially with all she was dealing with. She didn't need any extra pressure.

Speaking the words out loud as he read through his textbook, _Quirks and their Effect on the World,_ Kirishima was doing his damndest to memorize everything on the page.

 _"In the year 2008, the first person to user of a Hydrokenisis Quirk, Cross-Streams, emerged in the city of Madrid. Using their power to distil and reconfigure the local water of their stream, they managed to provide clean water for the entire city. This caused economic issues, as the Water Purifying companies of the city were losing income due to Cross-Streams actions. To remedy this, the two sides agreed to-"_

Any further researched on the now famous Water-Purifying contractor, Cross-Streams, was lost when Kirishima's head collapsed on the book, slamming it on the table.

"How the hell does Bakugou manage all of this?"

While her grades had always been a point of admiration for Kirishima, how Bakugou had been managing to keep them up with everything going on in her life only caused that admiration to skyrocket. Kirishima couldn't believe that she was somehow still scoring in the 90 percentile score.

It was almost like there were two sides to Bakugou. The one she showed the Class-1A and everyone else. The gruff, rude and frankly anti-social loner who strived to succeed at everything she did. Someone who was likely to curse you out when you talked to her. If she didn't physically attack you in response.

And then there was the girl that only Kirishima saw. The one he saw on that night when she came to his room with a bleeding hand and a mysterious bag, looking terrified as if her world was crumbling down around her. The one she saw that night when Bakugou finally tried on the shoes. The one who'd go from confident to withdrawn in an instant. Not to say she still wasn't gruff in those moments. She wouldn't be Bakugou if she wasn't.

Bringing his head up, Kirishima decided to try attempting to finish the paragraph he was reading. After about half a second, he decided that was a lost cause.

Getting up from his desk, he noticed a piece of white paper with tiny black writing typed on it.

The receipt. From the heels he got Bakugou.

"God. She loved those." A smile came onto Kirishima's face momentarily, but left as soon as it arrived. There was no question that Kirishima supported Bakugou. But he'd be lying if he said he knew everything about being Trans.

 _Transgender_. Kirishima had only heard it in passing throughout his life. Be it on the news. Or when his sister came home from her LGBT+ Meetings. He was never quite sure what it was. When it came to his circle of friends in his old high school, he only heard hints of it. And it was never anything kind. Ugly words thrown about them. Words that Bakugou repeated to herself. If Kirishima had known how hateful those words had been when his friends uttered them, how much they hurt Bakugou, he definitely wouldn't have stayed silent.

That night, when he learned that Bakugou was really a girl, Kirishima wasn't sure what to do. He wanted to be there for his friend, but he didn't have a clue how. He had never seen Bakugou break down. For all the time they knew each other, Bakugou was like paragon of manliness to him.

 _"Ei, don't say shit like that about her. She's a girl. Gotta stop throwing that word around."_ Kirishima shook his head at his casual use of his catch-phrase to describe Bakugou. The incorrect use.

To find out she had this inside her, this whole other part that Kirishima couldn't imagine….Kirishima would've never have expected.

But that's Bakugou. Has a Fort Knox armoury around her emotions. Afraid that showing she hurt was a weakness. It wasn't as if she thought that she had to do that to be strong, right? Freakin' All Might, the best of the best, was open about being nervous or vulnerable. Hell, Aiazawa gave a lecture on the importance of letting others know how you feel.

Although, it didn't really help that Aiazawa did it from his bed-roll. How does he even stand in that…

Kirishima had to resist the urge to just hug Bakugou and let her know that it was OK to cry sometimes. That it wasn't a big deal to have moments like she did during the night last week.

But Kirishima was aware that hugging Bakugou would most likely have consequences. Explosive ones, to be exact.

 _*Knock! Knock! Knock!*_

Hearing the knock, Kirishima checked the clock. 7:00 _PM_. They were planning to have their weekly movie night at 8. Thanks to lucky straw picks, Seto and Kaminari got lucky enough to pick the movie for the night. Probably some comedy with _Seth Rogen_ or something.

Thinking it was probably Ashido coming to tell him his job for the night, Kirishima picked up a blue hoodie off the back of a chair and quickly threw it on as he opened the door.

"Be there now, Ashi- Waaaahhhhhhhhhh!"

As soon as the door opened, a hand shot through the gap between it and the wall. Quickly clamping over Kirishima's mouth, the hand pushed him back into his room, the girl it belonged to following it.

After she had entered the room, Bakugou swiftly swung the door back shut, removing her hand as she did so from Kirishima.

"Did you have to do that? I'm gonna have the smell of your hand in my nose for the rest of the night!"

"My hand smells like fucking roses. You're lucky." Placing an ear to the door, Bakugou seemed to be listening to check if anyone was outside. Why she didn't just check before barging in, Kirishima didn't know. Bakugou was dressed slightly different today. A leather jacket bearing a few metal beads over the sleeves was adorned. The most noticeable difference was that fact that Bakugou had a beanie on her head, a grey one to be exact.

"Well, what's up?" Kirishima's goofy grin stretched across his face as he recovered from the impromptu visit. "Excited for movie night?"

While her back was facing him, Kirishima could tell Bakugou was rolling her eyes.

"Oh, yeah (!) I'm real excited to watch a movie with a bunch of fucking idiots as they laugh at fart jokes or some shit like that." A quick grumble under her breath followed this, before Bakugou finally pushed off the door and faced Kirishima.

Besides the change in attire, not much seemed different with Bakugou. Same frowning expression. Same tired eyes. Yup, that's a Bakugou!

"You know, you don't have to be search a jerk about everyone. They DID invite you. It would be nice if you tried to be a little friendlier." Kirishima placed hand on the wall, focusing his eyes on Bakugou. Whatever Bakugou needed throughout her transistion, Kirishima was there for her. But she would not, and would never put up with her bad mouthing the rest of the class.

This time, Kirishima got a full sight of Bakugou rolling her eyes to high heaven, given a dismissive grunt to emphasize it.

"Look, I'm not having this conversation right now. I need you to come with me." Pulling at her hat, Bakugou seemed to be attempting to not show her hair. This struck Kirishima as odd. She was generally pretty proud of her hair.

"Where we going?" Kirishima tried to keep the confusion out of her voice. He had been planning on having just another 'Thursday Movie Night' with everyone. Not quite expecting to go on a trip somewhere. Especially with Bakugou.

"I'll tell you on the way. Just fuckin' come on!" Nudging her head towards the door, Bakugou began to give off an impatient growl. There was obviously something important about where they were going.

And Kirishima wasn't about to leave before he knew where.

"No, tell me now. Look, you can't just come in her, out of the blue, and expect me to follow yo-"

"Got time?"

Cut short by the interruption, Kirishima blinked in surprise. For as long as they established that code-word, he had been the only one to use it. They had pretty much decided that it meant that Kirishima was going to ask a Trans-related question.

The disgruntled look on Bakugou's face showed that she wasn't happy about having to use the word.

"OK." Kirishima conceded. "Just let me get my shoes on."

Bakugou didn't respond, instead just pacing back and forth in front of the door, agitated. Definitely somewhere important. Kirishima was honestly getting curious about where they were going. It was something related to the Transistion. Why else would Bakugou use the code-phrase?

 _"Unless he's decided that it was a mistake telling me and is planning to murder me so no one knows? Nah, that's crazy talk. But still…."_

"Hey, Bakugou." Kirishima began, looking up from his laces. "You're not regretting telling me you're a girl and are now planning to murder me so no one will know? Are you?"

Giving the Kirishima the most 'What the fuck are you thinking' look, Bakugou brought a hand to the bridge of her nose.

"Believe me. If I wanted to kill you, you'd be fuckin' dead."

 _"Whelp! That's all I need to hear!"_

* * *

The bus ride into the city centre was pretty quiet. A few people were scattered across the seats. Not too crowded, so no-one had to stand. A man reading a newspaper sat in the front. A woman with child was sitting across from them, the woman making baby-talk with her child. The baby gave a small wave towards Kirishima, which he made sure to return.

They had been gone out of the Dorm for about thirty minutes, but still no explanation from Bakugou.

As he was about to ask, Bakugou reached up towards her head and tentatively took off her beanie. Kirishima was expecting to see her blonde hair.

Not her blonde hair with violet blotches on scattered throughout the space of it. Like someone shot a purple coloured paintball gun at her hair. This nearly made Kirishima laugh, but he managed to stifle it.

"Hey." Beginning awkwardly, Kirishima was pretty sure that it would just be as awkward to ignore as to bring it up. "You're hair looks really cool! I like how you styled it."

"You're a shit liar." Bakugou practically grumbled this into her hand as she placed in on her chin to rest on the buses window still.

"Was looking up tips on my chat-thing. How to help when I start feeling crappy about…." Bakugou looked at Kirishima and used her free hand to gesture to her body. "Some dipshit in the group said dying my hair might help. Found a dumbass giving advice on Utube for dying. Fucker didn't know what he was talking about." Trying to smooth out her hair, Bakugou seemed to be nearly trying to wipe out the purple spots of it.

Kirishima took all of this in. The group chat was familiar. Bakugou had mentioned that she had joined one recently. _Transformers_ , it was called. She also mentioned that she had gotten over ten warnings and one temporary ban about her behaviour on it. Still, talking to people like her seemed to help.

"Ah, Bakugou. You coulda asked me for help. I've been doin mine myself since High School." It was a point of pride how much skill Kirishima had gained in styling his hair. During the early try outs, he had a few incidents like Bakugou was going through right now.

Waving a dismissive hand, Bakugou didn't seem to really take what Kirishima asked into consideration. There it was again. Refusing to ask for help.

"Whatever. I just didn't want any of the idiots in the Dorm to see me."

"They're not idiots! Bakugou, you can't just keep being mean to your friends all the time."

"Fucking watch me." A hint of a smile appeared on Bakugou's face.

"I'm serious. One of these days, you're really gonna hurt someone's feelings." Leaning in so they're at eye level, Kirishima continued. "They're good guys. You should give them a chance."

The smile quickly disappearing, Bakugou switched to a more aggressive expression, bearing her teeth.

" _Good Guys?_ How fucking good you'd think they'd be if they found out about me?"

"That's not fair, Bakugou. None of them would have a problem with you." While Kirishima only thought the best of his friends, part of him could see where Bakugou was coming from. When it came to this, being careful was how you stay safe. You don't know how anyone truly feels about this until they come face-to-face with it.

Letting out something of an irritated groan, one that dismissed Kirishima's optimism, Bakugou refocused on looking out the window.

"Not everyone's as fucking great about it as you are."

This caused a momentary pause in Kirishima.

"You…..You think I'm doing great?" There was times that Kirishima was worried he was doing horribly at this. Like the incident with the paper in class. Sure, that day had a happy ending. But if something had gone wrong, Kirishima wasn't sure if Bakugou would have ever forgiven her. Hell, Kirishima wasn't sure if he would have forgiven himself.

Letting out another groan, although less angry this time, Bakugou half-turned back to Kirishima.

"Oh for the love of! Don't get all fucking sappy. We're in public for Christ's sake." Letting out a sigh, Bakugou seemed to be trying the calming techniques she had learned, albeit an accelerated version.

"Yes, you're doing great. There's a reason I brought you with me tonight."

Hearing that, this reminded Kirishima of what he was going to ask Bakugou before she took her hat off.

"You still haven't told me where we're going."

A few moments of silence passed between them before Bakugou replied.

"The Community Centre. The one on Blue Street."

Kirishima left a space for Bakugou to expand on this. When he got no reply, he decided to dig further for himself.

"And we're going there for…..?"

"Support group." This came out quickly and quietly from Bakugou, almost if she was trying to make sure Kirishima both did and didn't hear it. When she noticed he did from the change of expression on his face from confusion to concern, she continued.

"Someone in the Group-Chat lives in the city. Found out I lived near and told me there was a group nearby for people like us. Like me." This seemed to be all Bakugou was going to say on the matter, but one thing was still bugging Kirishima.

"But, why am I coming? Am I allowed?" Kirishima only had a broad understanding of how LGBT+ groups worked. He was only around ten when his sister went to one. And even then, he only ever went to a Relatives Centred meeting they held that year. Kirishima had no idea what was happening at the meeting besides the fact it had a buffet table.

"Yes, you're allowed. I wouldn't be fuckin' stupid enough to bring you if you weren't."

"You still didn't answer my question." Kirishima faced forward in the bus, worried that he was putting too much pressure on Bakugou. "Why did you want me to come?"

This was rewarded only with silence from Bakugou, as she placed her hands on her knees. Seeming to be actively ignoring.

"Bakugou." Kirishima began. "Are you…nervous about going?"

No change, barring a slight tightening of Bakugou's fists. Yup, she was nervous.

"Because that's OK! I get nervous all the time." This was one of the opening's Kirishima was looking for. To let his friend know it was OK to be honest about this stuff. "Lemme tell ya, on my first day of High-School, I was so fricken terrified of starting there. Worried the other kids would make fun of my teeth. So, my sister had to walk me into the room and sit down with me for the first ten minutes of class!" Kirishima let out a quick, but good natured laugh at his story. Trying to lighten the mood a bit with Bakugou.

Once again, there was little change to Bakugou's demeanour. But Kirishima could swear he saw the slight twitch of a smile when he told that tale. To Kirishima, that's a mark in the win column.

The bus came to a rather sudden stop in the road, nearly sending Kirishima falling into the back of the seat in front.

"We're here." Bakugou's first words in the last fifteen minutes. After giving Kirishima a look, she began nudging him to get up and let her out of her seat.

As they were walking down the aisle, Kirishima noticed the baby from before pointing at Bakugou's hair, the mother trying to stop her child from pointing. Bakugou either didn't see it or was just too preoccupied to care. Usually, something like that would earn a pretty loud, swear-filled rant from her.

Paying their ticket fee, the two hopped off the bus onto the curb. It was getting dark pretty early, the stars in the sky giving a nice ambiance to the night. They worked well in conjunction with the street lights.

"Nice night." A familiar non-response was given to Kirishima's comment. Bakugou seemed to be more focused on what was in front of them then was surrounding them.

The Community Centre was well built. Solid red bricks formed the foundation of it, with strongly placed window giving a strong feel to the stature. Above the door, a wooden sign stating _"Blue Community Centre_ " hung from a chain attached on the building.

A small crowd was forming in front of the door, sitting and standing around the stairs that led up to the entrance. About five or six people, all around their age. Each one an individual unto themselves. One was a girl with long white hair falling down to her shoulders. Another person had over four septum piercings in their nose. Kirishim winced slightly at how much that might've hurt. A man with a tattoo of a flaming dragon flowing down his arm turned his head up as the duo approached, quickly getting up and approaching them. Once he reached the two, he held out a greeting hand.

"First time?" A friendly smile that was on his face gave Kirishima a good feeling about this guy. "I'm Zach. We're just waiting for the Peer Educator to get here. He has the keys. You perfectly welcome to sit with us." Zach gestured a thumb back towards the group.

Bakugou, while originally been looking straight at the building, was now focusing on anything other than Zach. Kirishima was right to notice Bakugou was nervous.

"We'd love too." Kirishima nodded eagerly at Zach, and then leaned into Bakugou's ear.

"It's OK if you want us to wait somewhere else." A slight worry had come over Kirishima as he had agreed to Zach's offer. A worry that he had been pressuring or being too pushy towards Bakugou. While he had only looked up recently how to support a friend going through a Transistion, one important factor he learned was that you had to let your friend take it at their own pace. Not yours.

Fortunately for Kirishima, Bakugou looked up at his face, gave a quick dismissive grunt and moved towards the group, with Kirishima quickly following.

As they joined up with the rest of the people attending the meeting, Kirishima and Bakugou were greet with "Hey" "How you doin? "First time? You'll be fine."

The faces became a bit more clearer when they got close. The girl with white hair had a purple eyeliner colouring her eyes. The same shade as Bakugou's hair, but Kirishima knew better than to mention that. The person with the septum piercings had a somewhat lopsided bob. Kirishima put that hairstyle in the 'consider for myself later' folder.

Another girl, standing next too-

Oh.

The wide eyed panic of Bakugou showed that she recognized the person sitting across from them as well. The green hair. Crouched stance. Bow tied hair.

Kirishima could recognized Tsuyu from anywhere. As could Bakugou.

In their defence, Tsuyu seemed to be just as surprised as them, her mouth hanging slightly agape. Kirishima knew that Tsuyu left the Dorm one night a month. She always said it was just a regular thing with a friend from school.

A hurried breathing from Bakugou next to him took all of Kirishima's attention. This was a sign. A precursor to her bad panic attacks.

Gently putting an arm around her shoulder, something Bakugou would never let him do normally, Kirishima brought Bakugou down into a seating position at the left, outside of the stairs.

"Hey, Girl." Kirishima whispered, knowing how using feminine pronouns and references helped Bakugou feel more comfortable. He only hoped that this would be enough. "It's OK. It's OK. Just breathe. In for five seconds. Out for five seconds." Kirishima began starting the breathing himself, which Bakugou began to follow after a few seconds hesitation.

The rest of the people there look at them with concern, but kept their difference. From the expressions they wore, Bakugou wasn't the first person to have a moment like this here. And probably wouldn't be the last.

Wait, someone was missing from the group.

Hearing the sound of someone crouching down next to them, Kirishima was slightly taken by surprise by Tsuyy appeared. A more calmer face replaced the surprised one from a few minutes.

"Hey, Bakugou." Tsuyu started softly. "I ain't gonna tell anyone if you don't." While this seemed to be a casual statement, the atmosphere, place and tone of Tsuyu's voice spoke to what it truly was. A trust between the two of them, not quite ready to tell the people they knew about they were just yet.

And to Kirishima's delight, it did more than he possibly could to help Bakugou.

The breathing becoming more steady and regulated, Bakugou's eyes began to seem less excited and anxious. Looking up, she gave Tsuyu a quick nod of respect, before grabbing a bannister from the stairs and pulling herself up.

Kirishima attempted to help her, but a raised hand stopped him.

"I'm fine. I'm fucking fine, OK." Bakugou may have intended for this to sound like one of her normal grumpy 'I don't need anyone' remarks, but the fact that it came from a tired and quiet voice ruined the effect.

The three of them made their way back over to the group. Zach handed a water bottle to Bakugou, which she accepted without a word. Kirishima was amazed by the silent understanding of everyone here. Honestly, he was in awe of it.

Bakugou and Kirishima sat at the left side, resting their backs on the supporting pipes for the bannister. Tsuyu sat down opposite from them, quickly starting a conversation with the white haired girl.

Leaning in towards Bakugou, who was tentatively sipping the water bottle, Kirishima kept his voice down low enough so no one else could hear.

"If you wanna leave, just say the word."

Taking a longer drink of the water, Bakugou let it sit down next to her.

"I told you, I'm fine." Bakugou brought the bottle to her mouth again, taking another swig

"Besides, I got you here, don't I?" A weak smirk appeared on Bakugou's face, as she offered the water bottle to Kirishima.

Returning with a smile of his own, Kirishima took his own drink from it.

"You know I'm proud of you, right?"

Hearing Bakugou's trademark groan was a welcome sound to Kirishima's ears.

"What did I say about sappy shit?"

A low chuckle came from Kirishima, which Bakugou soon joined.


	5. Regret

Howdy, Everyone! This chapter is shorter than the others, and has less happen. It's also very character based. I just wanted to include this in the story.

Warnings: This chapter contains Transphobia, bullying, suicide mention, self-loathing, PTSD and panic attacks. This is probably my darkest chapter yet, so please put your comfort first before reading. If I have missed any warnings, please let me know so I can put them in.

Also, if any of this comes off as rude or offensive, please let me know. I'm just unsure sometimes of how my writing seems.

Also, in the flashback scene, Bakugou uses He/Him pronouns.

* * *

The three of them sat in silence. Well, silence wouldn't be the best word to describe it. The sounds of the group surrounding the trio added to a background melody of the Blue Street Community Centre. Bakugou had no idea how long the Community Centre had been around for, nor how long it had been hosting Transgender Support Groups. Frankly, she didn't care. This place wasn't anything to her until recently. She couldn't give a less of a shit if the Villains Society used it on weekends for meet-ups. Although, having a fight with them would sure help get rid of the nerves plaguing her right now.

But, despite not giving a damn how long this building had been listening and hosting the group, she couldn't help but think about how often the conversations surrounding her took place. The words of people trying to figure out their own identities. The fear they felt towards a world that was unkind to them far too much. The pain of it all.

Letting her eyes fall close, Bakugou decided to do a rare thing for her. She listened to other people.

"Yeah, got my Top Surgery date all set up! August, the 11th. Can't believe I'm finally doing this. Just need to get the money ready. Wonder if there still hiring at the Take-Out place…."

That was a term Bakugou had heard multiple times throughout her chat room adventures. Top Surgery. It seemed to be a goal for quite a lot of people. Something you'd spend years working towards, through appointments and paperwork and a whole lot of other stuff Bakugou didn't read about. Surgery talk, any type of surgery, made her uncomfortable. It was the reason she made sure Kirishima never asked about it. The idea of laying there defenceless, not able to speak, not able to move. Just at someone's complete mercy. Made her fidgety just thinking about it.

Flashes. Memories began to resurface. The villain, the fucker who turned her into a marble, catching Bakugou off guard, leaving her helpless while the one with scars pulled her into the shadows. The shadows. They don't leave her. Not in her recollections. Not in her dreams. She still feels it sometimes. Nights when its pitch black, not a light or anything to be seen in her room. When she closes her eyes, the shadows come back. Bakugou knows it isn't there. She was safe in U.A, at least she hope-thinks she is. No villain will get to them. Not without warning. But the shadows, they don't leave her.

No. Those memories are not going to get her tonight. Not fucking now. Letting her head rest on the bars behind her, she once again attempts to take in the sounds around her.

"Something's up with my Dog. She's doing that thing again. Y'know, with her leg? I think it's time to take to the vet. God, that guy's sooooo annoying.

Bakugou was slightly surprised to hear something like this. Something so…average. Bakugou had to spend most of her time in silence about her life, about being a girl. Couldn't let anyone know. Keep it a secret, locked down. Maybe not forever, but for now. Not until she gets a handle on it. Once it's under her control, then she'll decide what to do next. But, this meeting was a release. Somewhere she didn't have to worry about it being used against her. To hear some random girl talking about her freaking mutt just struck her as weird. They had all the time they wanted to talk about that stuff.

While Bakugou was willing to chalk up her annoyance to "Everyone but me is a fucking idiot", a quieter part of her mind spoke to something different. Jealously. This girl didn't feel as threatened as Bakugou, not scared to talk about what she wished, when she wished. She had control. And Bakugou craved that.

Letting out a frustrated breath, huffing like an annoyed dog, Bakugou readjusted herself and sat up a bit more straighter. For some reason, listening to everyone made her feel more relaxed. Like, the more she knew about the people, the less antsy they made her feel. Fuck if she knew why. So, once again closing her eyes and opening her ears, she let the sounds surround her.

Bakugou would regret that.

"I-It's that guy. Meries. H-Him and hi-his friends. They keep coming around to my house, throwing bottles at my window. Keeps saying he'll kill me if I don't stop coming to school. My parents won't stop asking why it's happening, but-but I can't tell them! I just wish he'd live me alone."

Bakugou didn't need context to know what was happening from these words, punctuated with sobbing and tears. And she couldn't stop the memories from flowing back. Only these one's came from an earlier age.

* * *

Two Years ago

"Plea-please, Bakugou. I don't- I didn't mean to-"

The words from the student were cut out by a crushing punch colliding with their stomach, smashing the air out their lungs. They quickly crumbled to the ground, gasping for breath.

"If I wanted to hear you talk, Freak-Boy, I'd ask!" Bakugou stood over his victim, in a sick form of victory. The kid, Neilis, was on his knees, trying to find someway, somehow, to get out of this. A situation she didn't deserve to be in. The two friends of Bakugou, Nelis didn't know their names, stood behind him. Laughing and cheering on each of his remarks and blows. Like spectators to a sport.

"I won't….I won't wear a skirt again! Please, Bakugou! Just-Please!"

Bakugou was a bully. A significantly popular bully, as a powerful Quirk like his would allow. But a bully nonetheless. You didn't need much to incite his wraith. Talk too much. Talk too little. Walk too fast. Walk too slow. Be weaker than him. Be stronger than him. It didn't matter. It never did with bullies.

But today, today he had a sadistic mission. Nellis, the 'weird' kid of the class, always keeping to herself. Had a Quirk that didn't stand out. Hell, no one was even sure what it was. Something to do with plants. She talked to Deku sometimes, which was a surefire way to become a target of Bakugou. But surprisingly, that wasn't the reason today why she was his particular victim.

No, it was because today, of all days, she decided to come to school wearing a skirt.

As soon as he saw it, Bakugou was planning to make tormenting her his purpose today. But something ate at him. Why was she wearing a skirt? She knew she would stand out. A boy dressed in something like that. So, why was she doing it? Curiosity was a weakness of Bakugou. But if you ever used that word to described it, you'd be picking up your teeth off the ground.

Another emotion, one that Bakugou wasn't sure of, also crept beneath the surface. Something that Bakugou had felt before, but never gave the time of day. An emotion that scared her. And Bakugou didn't like being scared.

So, during lunch, he corned the kid. Took two friends, Choji and….some dumbass name he couldn't bother to remember. He didn't need to know who they were. He just wanted an audience.

The answer Nellis gave didn't do away with the unknown emotion. It only caused it to rise, like a flame on tinder. And Bakugou did not like that. One. Bit.

And so, he needed to prove something to himself. Prove he wasn't like this little loser. Bakugou only knew one way to do that.

Left leg rising, Bakugou's foot came into contact with Nellis's face, a disturbing crunch sound resounding out throughout the halls. The rest of the people around were all frozen. Not cheering for Bakugou like his friends, but not doing anything to stop it. Deku was home sick today. He wouldn't have been standing around doing nothing if he was here.

Kneeling down to Nellis, grabbing a clump of her hair and holding her up face-face, Bakugou let his next words come out slowly and coldly.

"I'll say this once, you fuckin' tranny. If I see you around here again, I'll fucking kill you." And kill this feeling, Bakugou thought to himself. Seeing this kid, it brought that unknown feeling to the surface. And Bakugou spent soo much time burying it.

Before he could continue, an arm grabbed him and pulled him back up to his feet. A teacher, Mr. Scheel, glasses nearly falling off his face. Scheel was screaming into his face, demanding to know what was happening. The two of Bakugou's supporters quickly made themselves scarce. Typical. A few of the students, one's who had been standing closer to the attack than others, were running in behind Scheel. Checking up and trying to help Nellis. Bakugou barely noticed. He barely noticed what Scheel was saying to him. Barely noticed the one month detention he got. Barely noticed the fact he would've been expelled if it wasn't for the fact that someone with a Quirk as strong as his was a mark of pride for the school.

All he did notice was the Nellis didn't come back after that.

* * *

Shaking hands. The breath coming in and out, like cold blades in her lungs. Piercing and tearing her insides. The pain was all in her head, but that didn't matter. Bakugou felt like she was going to die.

Opening her eyes up cautiously, Bakugou looked across the group to the source of the voice. There, tear stained red eyes and crouched in fear, was the girl. A denim jacket clad her body, with a short brown bowel cut framing her face.

"Christ, she even looks like Nellis."

Bakugou used to look back at that memory with pride. Pride! What the fuck was wrong with her? Was this some sort of punishment? Karma paying her back for what she did to that kid. She doesn't even know what happened to Nellis. Did she leave? Did she…

The sharp daggers in her lungs getting worse, she felt as if her chest was about to explode. There was a valid reason Bakugou was afraid of anyone finding out. How she knew what cruel things people could do to people like her. She was one of those people. So filled with hate and rage. So short-sighted.

Looking around for anyway to ground her, Bakugou's eyes began to dart around the area. Looking at anywhere except the girl. Never her.

Tsuyu was still talking to the white haired woman. Would she be so trusting and helpful if she knew what Bakugou had done? To Nellis? To Deku?

There was always one thing that could give Bakugou support in times like this. One person. Spinning around to her left, she saw her best friend. Same stupid rooster hair. Same stupid grin. Same stupid Kirishima. Talking to the guy from earlier, Zach or whatever his name was.

And all she could think about what how he would react if he knew the real her. The person she used. The one who hurt people cos she felt like it. Kirishima never made his opinions about bullies secret. Hated them. Always did, always would. More than once, Kirishima had gotten into fights with Second Years' who had harassed the members of Class-1A. Got a few broken bones and detentions for it. Kirishima didn't care. Being there for his friends. That was all that mattered.

And Kirishima considered Bakugou one of her friends, and by God was she grateful for that. But would he if he knew? If he knew what his history held?

"Like I'd be friends with a piece of shit like you!"

"You think sorry makes up for it?"

"How many people did you hurt? How many!"

Imagining Kirishima saying these words, his whole opinion of her changing . Kirishima leaving her, seeing her as just another bully. She couldn't take that. Not him. Not Kirishima.

Compared to her other panic attacks, this was far more lowkey. The hurried breathing being the only sign to the outside world of it, and even that was covered up by the voices of those around here. But not completely covered. The feeling of something grabbing her hand reminded her of that.

Looking down, she saw someone else's hand grasping hers. Holding it tightly. Letting her know that she only had to let go when she felt like it. Amazing what Kirishima could convey through something like holding hands.

No-one could touch Bakugou and live to tell without a few broken bones. Bakugou supposed it said a lot about what Kirishima was to her that he could do this.

"Hey, Bakugou." Kirishima began, voice low enough not to be heard. "You good, girl?"

"I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you. I don't deserve it."

Unwilling to talk, unable to speak. This was not something she wanted even Kirishima to know she felt. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

But, with all her strength, Bakugou managed to muster up one question.

"Why do you like me?"

Eyes focused on the ground, Bakugou wasn't facing Kirishima. Didn't want to face him. She couldn't tell how he was reacting.

"Because you're the coolest girl I know." In her peripheral vision, Bakugou could notice Kirshima bringing his head down to her level, hoping that his words had reached Bakugou. Turning her head, Bakugou saw Kirishima's eyes. So kind and full of admiration.

Bakugou didn't respond. Didn't want to say that she didn't deserve this title. Didn't want to confess to all her pass sins. Didn't want to see the look in Kirishima's eyes change.

So, Bakugou just held his hand.


	6. Old Faces and New Places

TW: Dysphoria. Internalized Transphobia. Past toxic personality. Please put your comfort first before reading. Also, if I missed any TW's, please say and I'll put them in.

Hope everyone enjoys!

* * *

Chapter Text

The inner turmoil began to subside from Bakugou's mind. Grounding herself in the area around her. The environment. The building. The streetlights. The bars on the bannister they leaned on, how cold they felt. The passing cars, specks of light like fireflies passing by. The people.

Tsuyu talking to everyone there like they were old friends. Hell, for all Bakugou knew, they went back to pre-school days. This was a whole other aspect to Frog-Girl's life she never thought about. Bakugou never really thought about any of her friends lives outside the class. Didn't seem important to her.

Caring about other people was for pricks anyway. That was Bakugou's motto to herself since she knew left from right. Time would tell if it remained the party line. Part of her had to admit that Tsuyu being here was comforting, even if she wasn't quite sure why. Suppose it had to do with knowing that, if she had all these shitty feelings inside her, chances are Frog-Girl did too. Not even Bakugou like feeling on an island.

Zach, his "perfect student "type haircut looked weird with the flowing Dragon tattoo crawling down his arm. Bakugou knew jack with a side of shit about this guy. But, she also didn't dislike him. That made you practically golden in Bakugou's book. Only one person (Besides her parents, not that you'd ever get her to admit that) was exempt from receiving apathy at best from Bakugou.

And that Red-Haired, sharked tooth bastard was a one in a million. Which are also the chances of Bakugou finding someone she likes returning the feeling.

For someone who wasn't even Trans, Kirishima sure was being pretty chatty at a support meeting. After helping Bakugou through her episode, Kirishima had decided to make rounds throughout the people present, introducing himself and Bakugou. Since fuck if Bakugou introduce herself. They seemed to be taking well to Kirishima, cheerfully blabbing away to him. Kirishima could make friends anywhere. If you needed proof, just look at Bakugou.

But, while taking in her surroundings helped supress her anxiety, that's all it did. Supress. Not stop. Thoughts of that day were still reverberating throughout her mind. Echoes in a cave. Nellis's begging for mercy. The blood on Bakugou's hands felt like it was still clinging to her. It didn't matter how much she looked at her hands to check. Still felt it. Glued to her knuckles.

"If I wanted to hear you talk, Freak-Boy, I'd ask!"

Bakugou's threat to Nellis was in her ears, never leaving since she had the flashback to that moment. All that changed was who it was voiced, the tone changing from hers to the one the familiar one that she heard all too often.

"Can't believe it, can ya'? You're a little Tranny. Just like Nellis. How long do you think you can keep this up, boy? How long before everyone you know realizes what you really are? Hah, Nellis would pay to see this! Wonder if he's still alive….."

Clenching her fist tightly, Bakugou began pinning her thumb between her palm and fingers. Tight as a vice grip. Anything to make that voice go away. Make the thoughts just shut the fuck up!

"Bout time you got here!"

The voice. Zach's. Filled with excitement and delight. Any other time, Bakugou would roll her eyes to the sky at someone acting so loud and stupid. But right now, it managed to cut the Voice short. And for that, she was thankful to Zach.

That thankfulness evaporated pretty quickly when she saw who Zach was greeting.

Same purple hair. Same goddamm tired eyes. Same "I look like I have Heroin for blood" expression.

With the arm of Zach slapped around their shoulders, Shinsou stood there, looking as worn out as ever. Wearing jeans and a leather jacket, they gently shrugged off the arm, moving forward towards the door. As they did, they reached into their pocket and fished out a bundle of keys.

Whelp! Bakugou knew who the Peer Educator was now.

"Overslept."

"You really gotta stop taking naps all the time, my pal. This is like, the fourth time we've had to wait for you."  
Looking back over their shoulder, Shinso gave an understated groan.

"You know how it is. You buy some new clothes. You try on new clothes. New clothes make you Dysphoric. Dysphoria makes you tired. Tired makes you sleep." It annoyed Bakugou how much she related to that statement.

Kirishima seemed to be as surprised as Bakugou that Shinsou came to the meetings, barely reacting to say hi. Shinso simply cocked an eyebrow as they passed the stunned student.

Tsuyu, however, seemed to have a bit of a rapport with the Class-1B member. She was rewarded with a half-hearted wave from Shinso. Frog-Girl responded with about as much effort. Never in her life had Bakugou seen the two even spare a glance to the other. Learn something new every day. Or rather, every night.

Seated next to the door, Bakugou was the last to encounter Shinso. They didn't have a good relationship. Besides their still unresolved issues from the Sports' Festival, their random encounters in the hall left much to be desired.

"HEY, DIPSHIT! OUTTA MY WAY!" This quote came from the memory of the day the cafeteria was serving quarter pounders, and Shinso was unlucky enough to be in front of her.

There was many ways this could go down. Shinso could Out Bakugou to her class, but the fact that Bakugou could do the same to them made it unlikely. Still didn't change the fact that it made things awkward.

To their credit, Shinso barely even noticed Bakugou, simply moving forward to unlock the door. It was only after *Kcc-chk!" sound of the bolt pulling was when Shinso caught sight of the blonde, partially purple, haired girl.

Same vacant expression, Shinso gave Bakugou a look, locking eyes with her. And just as quickly, she turned back, pushing open the door.

"Try not to burn the place down, mm'kay." Saying this as they walked through the door, Bakugou barely had time to come up with her own witty response. And it would have been sooo witty.

…..

Bakugou was just going to tell them to go fuck themself, but that's witty in her mind!

As the door open, the rest of them soon followed Shinso, walking while talking with each other over this-that and some other shit Bakugou couldn't be arsed with listening to. Bakugou was busy keeping a keen eye on the crowd, waiting for a particular person to pass.

Well, two, apparently. Kirishima seemed to be in conversation with Tsuyu.

"I didn't know he came to this."

"They. Shinso goes by They/Them."

"Oh, shit, I am so sorry!"

Silently taking this in, Bakugou kicked to her feet to fall in line next to the two of them.

Seeing his friend, Kirishima's face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Bakugou! It's a small world, ain't it? First we meet Tsuyu. Now Shinso! Wonder if Aiazawa will come waltzing up those steps next." Kirishima rested his two hands on the back of his head, letting out a small chuckle.

"Nah-ribbit. There won't be anyone else coming. Unless we get another surprise-ribbit." On the word "surprise" Tsuyu's eyes darted up quickly towards Bakugou. She supposed that her and Kirishima turning up was as unexpected to Frog-Girl as them seeing her here. "Still-ribbit, there's been a lot of newbies around here lately. Well-ribbit, you'd know more about that than anyone." Tsuyu gave a low laugh to herself, not looking at Bakugou but obviously directing it towards her.

"Do I look like I'd give a fuck if anyone else turns up?" Bakugou began, focusing her eyes on Tsuyu. The guarded, hostile exterior she had so painstakingly designed popped right back up after her panic attack. Tsuyu already knew that she was Trans. She wasn't about to let her find out anything else. "As long as they keep their mouth shut, fuckin' Grape Head could walk through the door."

Stopping momentarily, a dark worry began to form over her head. The feeling of something dreaded and horrific as the most brutal nightmare she could possibly imagine.

"Please tell me there's absolutely no fuckin' chance that Grape-Balls-Head is gonna turn up." Bakugou knew there was a 99.999999% chance that Mineata wouldn't show his face around here. But, you could never be too careful, too paranoid when it came to Mineata. That fucking pervert could turn up anywhere. And next to Deku, Mineta was the worst possible person in existence who could find out about Bakugou.

"Mineata? No. That little perv is as Cis as an arrow." Tsuyu waved a hand in the air towards Bakugou, dismissing the worry.

In return, Bakugou cracked an eyebrow at her odd turn of phrasing.

"Cis as an arrow? The fuck's that supposed to mean?" Bakugou was well aware of what the term Cis meant. You look up anything Trans related and it's bound to pop into the searches pretty quickly.

"Y'know, like Straight as an arrow. Doesn't work as well, but we ain't got anything else to use."

Bakugou opened her mouth to reply with a curse filled tirade about how idiotic it was, but decided against it. While Bakugou wouldn't say it out loud, she owed Tsuyu one for helping her earlier.

Yup! Cos not pointlessly insulting someone is definitely equal to them pulling you out of a brutal anxiety attack(!)

Quickly waltzing into the room, Bakugou's eyes scanned across the interior of the centre. It wasn't anything special. The front area was a direct hall, leading downwards with a few doors to other rooms scattered at the sides. A reception space, a simple table and chair with a few flyers pinned up, stood in front of a glass door that blocked the back of the hall of the front.

Before she could walk any further in, she noticed the rather large crowd that had formed in front of her. No, not a crowd. A line. A queue up to the desk seemed to be forming.

Once Bakugou ascertained the situation, she did what she had always done with orderly lines.

She rudely barged through, ignoring the protests and irritation of her fellows. Some things rarely change.

"So, what the fuck do I need to do here? Do I gotta sign some shit or what?" Having finally pushed passed the dude in front (Who was currently glaring daggers at the back of her head), she hadn't yet laid eyes on who was operating the station.

Sitting in front of her was girl, around her age. Purple hair, same colour as Bakugou's, but much better done. Two crystalline shaped earing decorated both of her ears, obviously made out of some cheap substance. But what caught Bakugou's attention most were the red eyes she possessed. Red from crying. And the earlier easedropping that Bakugou had participated in meant she quickly realized who this was.

Images. Sharp and painful. Remembering how only half an hour ago this girl had broken down about how some disgusting Transphobe was making her life hell. How this girl's words were interspaced with Bakugou's own bullying of Nellis. All of this combined into an internal hell for Bakugou.

The girl, who's nametag stated Melissa, seemed to be stunned by the sudden appearance of Bakugou. Katsuki could hardly blame her. She wasn't exactly the most friendly looking of people.

Before this awkward and painful silence could continue, a quick hand grasped Bakugou's shoulder and pulled her to the side of the line. The queue resumed pretty quickly as soon as she was removed.

Knocked out of her near-anxiety attack, Bakguou quickly regained her marbles, cursing slightly to herself for loosing it again. As she readjusted to her surroundings, the identity of the hand became clear.

And Bakugou could scarcely think of a worse person to deal with right now.

"Look." Shinsou began, a noticeable anger edging their voice slightly. "I know you walk around the school, thinking you're all hot-shit. But when you're here, you ain't better than anyone else. So, don't even think of pulling this shit again or you're gonna find your anger issues self flat on your ass outta here." The confidence and composure that Shinsou held themselves with gave Bakugou a clue that they had done speeches like this before. "We clear?"

To anyone else, Shinsou would be making a reasonable request that would be easy to follow.

But Bakugou was rarely easy. She was voted "Biggest pain in the ass" out of her class. (The fact she burned the yearbook and demanded a recount didn't help matters.)

"What?" A cocky and dismissive smirk forming on her face. "You think I'm scared of you, ya Hero-Wannabe?"

The last taunt managed to get an annoyed smirk from Shinsou.

"No, I don't. You're way too stupid to be scared of anyone." Leaning in closer so the rest couldn't hear (Bakugou suspected she might have been making sure the others heard as a warning to any other troublemakers in the group), Shinsou's smirk disappeared.

"But if you're here, chances are you're scared of something. Being alone. Feeling scared. Not knowing what the hell is going on in your life. Whatever it is, you need this group. And if you don't treat the other people here with the respect they deserve, you're out. And that scares you."

The silence that Bakugou responded with was all the answer Shinsou needed. Even if she couldn't admit it, Shinsou was far too close to the heart of things.

Stepping back, Shinsou let out a breath to ease the tension that was obviously apparent.

"Treat these people right, we'll be the best support network you'll need. Pull any crap, and you're on your own. It's really that simple."

Letting out an aggravated grunt, Bakugou's attempt to get some control over the situation, she started to walk by Shinsou.

"This the welcome you give to everyone?" A shrug of the shoulder accompanied Shinsou's response.

"More often than you think. Being a Peer Educator ain't easy." Shinsou began walking downwards the hall towards the glass barrier, pulling a keycard out of their pocket.

"I see you brought a friend. Make sure they keep a tight hold on your leash, OK Blasty." With a quick swipe into the security module, the glass door unsealed.

"Alright everyone! Orderly fashion in. To you regulars, y'know the drill. If you're new, first door on the left." After the quick introduction, Shinsou led most of the people into the rec room of the centre.

A slew of curse words began swarming Bakugou's mind, wanting to throw each and every one towards that insomnia riddle asshole. But, remembering their words, they decided against it.

Or at least, save it until they're back in school.

"A minute in the building and you've already caused a scene. I'd say that's a record girl." The beaming grin of Kirishima quickly came into Bakugou's eye view as her best friend walked back from the desk.

"I'm the centre of attention wherever I go. Can't fuckin help it." Kirishima was probably the only person Bakugou would let talk to her like that.

"Tsyu went ahead with some of her friends. Ya just gotta sign in at the desk and we're good to follow." Kirishima propped up a helpful thumb towards the aforementioned desk.

Glancing quickly in the direction, Bakugou's eyes propped open slightly when she saw Melissa was still there. Bakugou couldn't put her finger on what she felt when she looked at her. It was like guilt, but she hadn't done anything to this girl. Not like she did to Nellis.

Or Deku.

Realizing that was a rabbit hole she didn't want to go down, Bakugou supressed the thoughts and walked to sign in.

"So." A bit more nervous than before, Bakugou tried not to make eye contact with Melissa. "I need to sign a form…..?"

While she still seemed a bit intimidated, Melissa professionally pulled out a clipboard. Plain white paper with spaces to fill in was hanging on it, many different colours of pen highlight previously signed names. Next to it was a space to pronouns.

Spending a few moments looking at the simple piece of paper, it surprised Bakgugou how much thoughts this was causing. A name and pronouns. Give that to a lot of people, it's a quick question answered just as quick. But give it to Bakugou and people like her, it causes a whole overflowing river of feelings.

Is this MY name?

Do this suit me?

Is this me?

But, nothing's set in stone.

Scribbling in a more elegant font than someone with her manners had any right too, Bakugou laid back the clip board on the table.

Bakugou Katsuki. She/Her.

A bit of pride found itself into Bakugou as she looked at this. It felt….nice to see her make a declaration in pen of who she was.

And she wasn't the only one who was proud.

"WOOO! You did it, Girl!" A familiar feeling of an arm pulling her to the side happened once more. The only difference was that this time it was an arm pulling her into a warm hug.

Kirishima. Her ally and best friend through all of this. And also the biggest fucking dork she knew.

And she wouldn't have him any other way.


	7. DMCs and Puns

Hi! Sorry for the late update. I was just trying to figure out what to write about and make sure it was good. Had a bit of a brain crunch about it, but I hope I did well!

Also, for the sake of the story, I took some liberties with editing how the rules for going on HRT work.

TWs: Internalized Transphobia. Misgendering. Mentions of Transphobia. Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first. If I miss any warnings, please tell me so I can put them in.

* * *

"The Queer Sphere?" Incredulous would probably be the best word to describe Bakugou's tone.

"Yes." Not even looking up from the clipboard in their hand, Shinsou nodded to the newbies inquiry.

"This room is called the Queer Sphere?" There were many things that could anger Bakugou. Sappy Movies. Poor hand writing. Midoriya. Loud people. Laziness. Midoriya. Being made to look weak. The fact that she can never get a good stream for Daredevil on the Dorm's wifi. Midoriya etc. But puns stood far above all of those.

"Yes." Once again, Shinsou's eyes did not leave the surface of the clipboard. Bakugou was nearly 99% sure that the violet haired fucker finished reading about five minutes ago and was just messing with her.

"Why the fuck would you call it that?"

"Yes."

"Stop saying yes!" OK, now Bakugou was a 100% sure.

Throwing her hands in the air, Bakugou let herself lean backwards on the counter that laid behind the two of them.

In Shinsou's defence, the nickname was sorta apt. The bottom end of the room curved gently in a semi-circle, creating a cozy little cove for people to sit and talk about their feelings and other mushy bullshit Bakugou couldn't stand.

That's what was presently going on. As soon as the crowd entered, they all the Queers made their way to the Sphere. There, a scattering of beanbags and plastic chairs were scrambled across like breadcrumbs for any one looking for rest. The assorted group only proved that. A mixture of appearances. White dyed hair. Semi-shaved bobs. Septums piercings. Some were even dressed in gothic style dresses. Bakugou would never admit it, but asking them where they got those was becoming increasingly tempting.

Bakugou compares Kirishima to a duck for many reasons. How nearly any bad shit just slides off his back and out of his mind like water. Or how , for some God only knows reason, the man loves bread. Like, seriously, he always has a slice in his hand in the dorm. Not even toasted or anything. Just bread. All the time. It just really bug Bakugou for some reason.

But the main reason Bakugou had come up with this little similarity was due to one fact. When Kirishima talked to people, he was nothing short of a duck to water. Didn't matter who the hell they were. Hipsters. Literature buffs. Comic book nerds. Fashionistas. The ambitious. The lazy. The short tempered. The mellow. The Midoriya's or the Bakugou's. Kirishima could get along with anyone. And he was proving that fact.

Lying back on one of the beanbags, gesturing widly with his free hand as he regaled the eager listeners of the group about some great story of the internship with Fatgum. Everyone was enthralled, like moths to a flame. When Kirishima told a joke, they laughed. When a daring exploit was remembered, they'd "Oooooh" and "Ahhh" in tune.

A few minutes ago, Bakugou had been a part of the group of listeners. She wasn't exactly engaged though. Bakugou had already heard this story before when the Duck returned. Rather, she was doing what she did best: Looking like a grumpy teenager in a place she didn't want to be. The Bakugou-Chic, as Urakaka had nicknamed. Bakugou still needed to get her back for that.

She remembered her mission coming here tonight: To talk to people and have someone who'd understand what she was going through. Someone who knew what it was like to want to tear off your skin. And, to be fair, some had approached. A few generic greetings, something to draw this brooding girl out her shell. Bakugou wanted to let it out, to try and get some insight between them.

But a certain voice took issue with that.

"Ah, that's cute! The little freak wants to make friends! Whatta ya' gonna tell them first? Oh, how about that time you drove a kid just like them from your school. Oooh, they'll get a great kick out of that, ey, Boy."

This voice. Bakugou knew it. A constant companion throughout her life. A watchdog that would bark whenever she looked inward, tried to figure out who she was. The bite of its words, like acid burning in her mind. Stooping her from being herself with whatever tool it had available. Shame. Disgust. Self-loathing. Guilt.

And the Voice was succeeding tonight. At any attempt from here fellows to welcome her into this group, she spurned them. Not in her usual hostile way, no. The warning from Shinsou still weighed heavily in her mind. Bakugou would not lose this place. Instead, she would just give a non-starter of a reply, or just flat out ignore them. They probably thought she was a stuck up bitch, which wasn't far off from the truth.

Eventually, the claustrophic nature of the crowd started to bother her. Needed to get somewhere. Stretch her legs. Get a drink. Any reason to leave. Which brought her to the beverage counter at the back.

And next to the person who probably wanted the least to do with her.

"Soooooooo." The long drawl of Shinsou's voice was intentional. "Why aren't you with your friend. From what I've seen in school, he's the only the one that just get's the bark from you rather than the bite."

"You always such a smartass?" A rough snarl of a reply from Bakugou. She knew antagonising them wasn't the right thing to do. But, it was how she dealt. Anger and rage are a hell of a way to forget your crippling insecurity. And Bakugou learned how to wield those well.

"Only on Mondays and Wednesdays. I'm just an ass on the rest." Finally looking up, Shinsou gave a light chuckle to Bakugou as they moved towards a little coffee table next to them. As they sat down, their leg kicked out the chair opposite. After a few moments of hesitant waiting from Bakugou, Shinsou began gesturing with their head to sit down.

Cautiously, Bakugou let herself rest on the seat.

"Okay!" Somehow, Shinsou sounded energized and tired at the same time. One of the advantages of insomnia it seems. "Was going to ask you this after you got settled in here with everyone, but that doesn't look like it's happening anytime soon. So! May as well do it now." With their middle finger (Which Bakugou assumed was a dig at her), Shinsou flipped the current page of the board over.

"The hell are you talking about?"

"Right, for a lot of us, this little group here is our first Port in the Storm, I guess you could say. Like, when you wanna get going with the whole…Trans thing, you come to the group." Still locked onto the board, Shinsou's eyes turned upwards towards Bakugou. "Tell me if I'm hitting the mark here?"

Tempted to tell them that they couldn't be more far off the mark, the fact that it would've been a lie stopped Bakugou. Truth was, the closet was beginning to become too tight for her. 'He' and "Him" had started to hurt worse than any training injury. Being locked on the boys dorm was steadily turning into a prison. Suffocation. That was how she was feeling. No air, nothing to let her breathe.

Bakugou looked across the room at Kirishima, who now seemed to be quietly listening as Tsyu introduce him to her friend.

No, she did have something to help her breathe. But as good as 'Shima was, it wasn't enough. She couldn't live off their talks and confiding in him. Most of all, she was sick of using him as a crutch. Bakugou didn't need someone to help her be her. And she didn't want to put that weight on Kirishima.

Realizing that Shinsou had been waiting for a reply, she nodded.

"Coolio" Of fucking course they say coolio.

"This." Shinsou gestured while raising the clipboard. "Is a little checklist. A run down of questions we have to see where you're at, transition-wise. That way, we can figure out how to help you and get you to be the person you wanna be. I know it sound more cheesy than nachos, but it works." A goofy grin appeared on their face at their equally goofy comparison.

The scowl was Bakugou's response to it, but she supposed it made sense. Can't help her if they don't know who she is.

"Fine Just don't ask anyting fucking stupid." Bakugou began tightening her grip. There were questions she didn't want to answer, to Shinsou or herself. For now, some things were best left unilluminated.

"Well, they're about you, so that kinda limits things." A crooked smirk appeared at their little jab.

"The fuck you just say?"

Holding their hands up in a pacifying manner, Shinsou's smile softened. "OK, last one. I promise. Now." Quickly drawing a pen from their pocket, Shinsou held it to the first question. "You ready?"

Still eager to get back at them for the insult, Bakugou had to save that for later. For now, she could just think of ways to get the purple haired fucker back.

"Fine. Fine. What's the first question?"

"Gender and pronouns?"

"Girl, She/Her." For a few seconds, Bakugou gaped at herself. That came out instantly. No second guessing or guarded behaviour. Not Voice taunting in her head. Jus the truth.

For the first time, Shinsou gave a genuine smile to Bakugou. Something you'd give to a friend, if they were that anyway.

"Awesome. We have a lot of Trans-Femmes here, if you need advice for anything." Shinsou quickly filled in the box as they gave out the helpful tidbit.

"OK, and do you have any goals for yourself? In terms of medical, like hormones?"

Taken aback by how sudden this question came out, going from basic to big pretty fast, it took a second for Bakugou to reply.

"H-Hormones?" While surgery was an off limits subject for Bakugou, HRT was a whole other beast. They always sounded like a godsend to her. Something that could undo the damage that had already been done to her body. She just didn't expect it to come up so soon.

"Yeah, you know. Fem-eminems. Anti-Cistamines. Girl-Pills. Estrogen." The fact that they rapidly shot off all these colourful nicknames gave Bakugou at hint that this was far from Shinsou's first rodeo. "You don't have to answer. All this shit can be scary at first. Feel free to ski-."

"No." Halting Shinsou's offer in a hoarse voice, she continued. "No, I want to… I'd like-fuck!" Stuttering and stammering, Bakugou felt like she'd never get the words out. Just be constantly tripping over herself and falling in the verbal dirt, as it were.

"I'd….Hormones, yeah." Looking anywhere but Shinsou in shame, Bakugou let out a slew of curses towards herself. This wasn't her! She wasn't some little idiot who freaked out at something like this. She's number one in her class. The best of the best. Why the fuck was this happening?

Could feel it. The voice. It's slow whispers becoming louder and louder, infecting her mind.

"Hey." That wasn't the voice.

"Look, I know we can't fucking stand each other. And frankly, I'm happy with that. You're a little shit hothead. But when it comes to this, I'm here. Whatever you gotta say, say it. Ain't gonna judge you." Looking up, Bakugou caught sight of Shinsou's face, looking far more like a concerned sibling than they had any right to be. "Us Gender-Pirates got to stick together."

A chuckle escaped Bakugou's mouth at the last sentence, something she'd never let out normally. This whole thing was really changing her.

Feeling the courage coming back, she sat back with strength. Fuck the Dysphoria. Fuck the anxiety. And Fuck that Voice. She's Bakugou. She'll be the best hero, and she's gonna be the best goddamn girl!

"Yeah, I want to start hormones. The Estrogen."

Nodding and writing came from Shinsou. "And when would you like to start?"

"Now would be fucking great." Part snarky grumble, part truth.

"I think you'll find a lot of people here agree with you." Chuckling to themself, Shinsou's follow up was unexpected. "We can get you an appointment with an Endocrinologist. Could take between one-three months. You might need to make some other appointments. Make sure you're 'Really Transgender'" The eyeroll that escorted those last two words showed exactly what Shinsou thought of the process.

"Don't I need my parent's permission, or whatever bullshit?" Trying to keep the surprise out her voice, Bakugou returned to the gruff state she was known for.

"Not quite. New law means that, if approved by a medical professional, it's up to the person. World may be pretty shit, but it's getting better."

"Ain't happening quick enough." This got an agreeable nod from Shinsou. Resting her jaw on the paw of her hand, Bakugou looked towards the group of people, but one stood out. Tsyu. Bakugou never knew she was Trans. She knew that being able to tell was a load of bullshit, but she couldn't help be in awe of the fact. Maybe that could be her someday.

"So." Refocusing back on Shinsou, Bakugou placed both of her hands at the side of the table. "I can really do this. Hormones. Transition. The whole fuckin nine yards?"

"Bingo, girl. Just meet up for the appointments we give, tell them how you feel and you'll be golden." It felt weird to finally here someone other than Kirishima call her a girl. Especially didn't expect to hear from this sleep-deprived fucker. But, strange times and all that.

Still felt damn good.

Before they could continue, a sharp sound caught their attention.

"Yo, Girl!" Two "girls" in the span of a minute. Must be Bakugou's lucky day. The fact it came from Kirishima only made her more sure. The gleeful, innocent grinning face of the Crimson Riot fanboy was something she welcomed. Even if she didn't always appreciate it.

"What do you want, Duck?" Bakugou had noticed that Kirishima was wearing a small badge he didn't have when he came in. What was written on it confirmed where it came from.

Support your Sisters. Not just your Cis-ters.

"I don't fucking deserve him." No Voice this time. Just Bakugou.

"I was wondering if you wanted to tell the story about the shoes?" Kirishima threw a thumb back towards the gathering of people, some of whom were throwing glances at Bakugou in interest. Knowing Kirishima, he probably spent the whole time talking her up.

"Why the fuck would I?" This wasn't what came out of Bakugou's mouth. It was tempting to say. Far too tempting. The urge to push away. To isolate. Never let herself get hurt. Never take the risk

But, seeing Kirishima's genuine smile…..maybe it was worth the risk.

"Fine. But were telling it my way." Pushing out the seat, Bakugou looked towards Shinsou questioningly, eager to see if there were any more boxes to tick.

"We can do what's left later. The first three are the big ones. Rest are pretty much just filler." Taking a sip of their water, Shinsou waved her off. "Go have fun, you little shit."

Bakugou decided to let them have that one.

The rest of the night went by like a breeze. Well, a few hailstones in the breeze, but nonetheless a breeze. Bakugou told the fabled "Shoe-Story" regularly cursing at any who interrupted while Kirishima attempted to apologize for her. At the end of it, a chorus of "Same though" came from many, which she took comfort in.

Socializing hadn't gone exactly as Bakugou had planned. Kirishima brought her to new people he'd met only an hour ago, introducing them to Bakugou as if they were old friends. The non-committal replies from earlier remained of her. But for some reason, the Voice didn't follow. Bakugou had no illusions. It wasn't gone. Seemed to be taking the night off though.

Looking at Shinso, who seemed to be darting between conversing with the people and doing paperwork at a back table, Bakugou felt like she knew why.

The night soon came to a close, the building needed to be used for the A.A Meeting that was scheduled to take over a 9:00. The group dispersed in smaller parties, some leaving with each other. Some accompanying others for their safety, but Bakugou didn't like to think about that.

Tsyu left by herself Kirishima had happily offered her come back with them, which Bakugou wasn't sure hoe she felt about that. Shaking her head, Tsyu declined.

"If we all come back with each other, might seem suspicious. I said I was meeting with some friend from my old school. What did you's say?"

Kirishima looked curiously at Bakugou for an explanation.

"I didn't tell them fuckin' anything." This didn't seem unusual to Bakugou, but Kirishima facepalming and Tsyu shaking her head dismissively got her thinking she might be wrong.

Nah. They were just stupid and Bakugou was completely in the right.

"I'll see you two back at the dorms. " Turning to walk, Tsyu quick span the full way around to face the pair once more. Or rather, Bakugou.

"Hey, my door's always open. It'll be cool to have another girl like me at school. We can talk shit about all the Cis in our class." Tsyu held out her fist for a response from Bakugou.

"Sure, whatever." Bakugou returned the fist bump, doing all she could to appear as reluctant as possible. This was all for show. She felt a little safer knowing Tsyu shared the same building as her.

Waving as she walked away, Tsyu left Kirishima and Bakugou to themselves. It was rather anticlimactic, since they had to wait for their bus. The two found a bench, quickly sweeping off the twigs from a nearby tree, and sat in silence.

"Fun night?" Same innocent grin, beaming like the sun at Bakugou.

"S'alright." Compared to that smile, Bakugou's expression could be described a crescent moon frown.

"I saw you were talking to Shinsou. Didn't know you two were friends." A tinge of hopefulness. Kirishima always wished Bakuogu could expand her social circle. Did not think it would be the person she regularly got in hallway arguments with though. And a few hallway fist fights, for that matter.

"They're an idiot." Bakugou snorted derisively. "But they know what they're talking about." High praise from Bakugou.

"You wanna come back next week?" A simple and understandable question from Kirishima.

"Yeah." Sure, she rationalized this in her mind. She needed to come back to make her appointments. It would look well on her application for HRT. She could learn how to pass here. But the truth was, she enjoyed it, no matter how surprising that was.

What came next wasn't surprising.

"But you're coming with me." Bakugou lightly punched Kirishima's arm affectionately. He was her Duck.

And to that, Kirishima smiled.


End file.
